Slw, how awful - for him to have to go forward with the delusion of being sexually abused by us. Some of his yelling was so anguished, it was horrific - and we were just having to hear his pain. I am glad our state recognized emotional distress and my husband is quite sure the angry, enraged, yelling for us to stop is a viable threat of harm.
Jan, I know I am enjoying the reprieve. I think I am lucky though, I dealt with depression years ago after my children’s kidney disease was discovered. We each, individually, have to come to deal with the sadness in a way that works for us. For me, I didn’t want to live in fear every day anymore. First I had to finally recognize that fear of my children dying was the primary emotion. After I decided I didn’t want to live in fear anymore, I had to figure out what I did have going forward. Deep sadness takes up a lot of your person. I eventually realized I could be someone going forward, not the same as I was before, but still someone.
I finally began to laugh again when I laughed with someone whose son also had scz. I guess I needed to know there were other people who felt the deep pain I did - I have to admit, I resented people who didn’t know real pain in life and still do somewhat. I don’t wish them tragedy in their lives, I just think they are clueless about how difficult life can be.
The one suggestion that we have to let ourselves feel the pain in life to be able to feel the joy? There might be something to that, but I think we really have to guard ourselves against getting stuck in the pain. Having been depressed once, I don’t want to go back there, its awfully hard to get out. We have to be careful, if we suppress the pain, it could be likely to cause other issues. IF there is one thing we all know on the board - good mental health must be protected.