Note to self, heat makes it all worse


#1

Today was a very odd Sunday. Our heater has been broken and slowly over the course of a few days our place has been getting hotter and hotter until the last two nights our place felt like a tropical heat wave. We’ve opened the windows but any moisture that came in with the breeze seem to cling like a steam room.

My poor brother and I both had nightmares, headaches and both of us have been feeling a little spacey today. This has hit my brother harder then me.

This is day two of not sleeping well at all. Due to the heat, we haven’t been that hungry. So he missed two doses of meds due to not being hungry enough to eat. (because you take Latuda with food)

Then he just started getting floaty, disorganized and very spaced out. I got him over to our parents house. He got cooled down in a bath, had a good midday breakfast, took his meds and started to feel a tiny bit better. He was going to try and take a nap. He didn’t want to be inside so we cleaned up the old airstream trailer in my parents back yard and he went to lay down in there.

Soon he shot out of there saying he could feel it all coming back. He was ill in that trailer when he was younger, and being in there again will make him ill again. Ok, I get it. No trailer. We can’t go back to the flat yet, the heater guy will come tomorrow. I don’t want to see day three with no sleep, no food and missing meds.

Our other brother offered us a roof for the night, but J is afraid that for himself not feeling 100% he might scare our brother who just came back into our lives. So J declined.

I am looking for a cozy hotel room for us for one night. Poor J has had a hard day. I have to say, I’m looking forward to some sleep and a bath too in fact.

I’m not about to panic yet. I’ve seen worse then spacey and disorganized. I know his head circus is amping up. I can see it. I hate to see it. But I don’t usually panic until he does. He’s not having a good day, but I call this a 5.3 on the 11 scale. (Our scale goes to 11, My brother loves the movie “Spinal Tap”)

I do have to admit, his kidnapper education center has me slightly nervous. I’m hoping this idea will drop with the temperature in our apartment.

I’m not SZ so I might not have the right to use this word, I’m sorry if this is presumptuous, but it’s a little triggering or bad memory for me to be again going over all the kidnapper training that I was put through when I was little. I’ve felt 8 years old all day today.

I’m beginning to think that a break is like a cake, there are many things go into making it.

Thank you


#2

Your brother has been a godsend to me and my family. I wish him a swift recovery and I hope that you guys get some rest and good food in your bellies soon.


#3

Oh no, sorry about your and James’ troubles. Hopefully y’all found a nice hotel room for the night and can relax and be comfortable.

Fingers crossed the heat issue will be resolved tomorrow and things will quickly get back to normal. Hang in there.


#4

When I have situations like that-that throw me back to the past-I have to push hard to remember that this moment is different and its not the same situation. it takes a lot of practice! I dont think you can ever erase what is a part of you, but in time and with practice, it becomes less threatning. Hope your brother recovers quickly and YOU get a cool shower and some sleep**


#5

Stress makes symptoms worse. It was obviously a very stressful day.


#6

Hi everyone, Thank you for all the kind post.

We are just not catching a break. I went upscale on the hotel room and the posh place was hosting some convention. There has been loud people in the hall, banging on the walls, parties in the next room.

This did NOT help my brother. He slept so badly. He must have been having some terrible dreams because he would jump up, run over and check my pulse. I’m still alive.

We checked out over an hour ago. (3:00 a.m.) it was so loud and silly. I made a point to staying in my PJ to check out. I should have gone for the seedy looking cheep place that is always clean and quiet. We’ve stayed there before when the building was being painted and bug treated.

So now I know, just because it’s fancy and expensive, doesn’t mean it’s better.

I dropped my brother off at our parents house and came back here to get stuff ready for the heater guy. It’s not going to be an easy day for J. I can see it. Mom and Dad can keep an eye on him while I’m at work. I’ll be getting off morning shift about the same time they have to leave for work. So he won’t be alone.

Food, meds, no stress are all ingredients that have been knocked out of balance. But I think the biggest ingredient missing right now is sleep.

When he doesn’t sleep well, the paranoia amps up, which affects his sleep more. I’m closely watching the 11 scale.

I have to say, to my amazing brothers credit, he was still trying to crack some jokes and keep a glimmer of humor as we were leaving. I use his humor as a big indicator because he will try an be funny to last drop.

If there is NO humor in anything at all, then I know the 11 scale is at 13. We don’t let the scale get to 13 anymore.

Since there is more then one recipe for a mental health cake, I am always looking for other peoples recipes.

When your loved one starts to hit a spiral, what do you do? I think I do an OK job of handling this. But I can always be better.

Thank you all for your support.

My lighthouse is a little hazy and turbulent right now


#7

Big hugs to both of you. Seems like there is always something happening to keep you guys on your toes. Hopefully the heater is fixed today and soon you guys can get back to being at home.

As usual great job on handling things. I sometimes write about the recipe for disaster. You are a big part of the recipe of stability. Take care of you too!


#8

Thank you BarbieBf,

Heater man was useless and what ever he did turned our neighbors place into a sauna too.

The big 1950’s silver airstream trailer is quiet nice inside since the parents redid it. But it’s not going to work for tonight either. J says he spent too much time in that trailer going out of his mind, and for now, he doesn’t feel like he can be trapped in there without getting worse again. He doesn’t want me sleeping in there either because he doesn’t want it to make me ill as well.

I had no idea heat could be so chaos making. I’m trying to find a place were he can sleep for tonight that won’t amp up the disorganized thought process and the paranoia even more. He’s not going to go back to ANY hotel now. NO trailer, no parents house, no brothers house, Our place is too hot, I don’t think he’s calm enough for tent camping.

For now, I parked my station wagon in the shade and he’s asleep in there. All steel, tinted windows, sturdy locks. I really hope when he wakes up, he feels better.

Usually, in the past, this sort of hope would be a long shot. But these day, he does pull out of his head circus faster. Seeing this recent turn of events has helped remind me not to take anything for granted.

At the same time, I am in awe of how hard he’s working to pull himself together as quickly as he can. I can see that there is a huge fight going on in his mind right now. All I can do is enjoy the down time and have some tea and get ready to call his doc if J isn’t doing better when he wakes up.

Thank you for letting me vent a bit.


#9

Wow, poor James. I hope he gets back on track soon. Does he need a little “space” , like a park or something? That’s what I need when I’m stressed. I see you say camping wouldn’t help. But maybe a walk or something? I know when I am going through times where I just feel like I can’t hang on another minute, that talking to a calm person helps me stay calm. When I am right on the edge of losing my sanity I need to talk to someone who is saner then me. That’s what helps me. If the person who is “talking me down” is panicking about my problems it affects me and I just get more and more disturbed. But hey, everybody is different, and I don’t want to make things worse in any way. You guys are intelligent and you will do what you can do. I’m sorry if this is a bit disjointed.I just got off of work and I had a rough commute and I had to call my mom and vent a little to her. But I hope you guys come out of these problems OK. Tell James that I said I hope he feels better. I will see you guys around.


#10

Hi Nick,

As you can see, things are getting better. The heater is broken, but not spewing steam.

Usually my brother will go for a walk in the park or if we’re out in public, getting to a semi-private open space will really help. Open space and fresh air always help. Not just him, but me as well.

I’m glad you found a nice park by your place.


#11

you are such a great sis, he is very lucky to have a sister and family like you guys all batting on his side :slight_smile:

you are like a champion for mental illness, take care x


#12

I read about a study that showed that Schizophrenics symptoms get worse with heat. They/we do best at around 50 degrees. I’m wondering about the head aches possibly being caused by something about the heater, but not heat.