Tell us how you are today?


Hope, thank you for reminding me to maintain hope. You and your friend are right. My son is young, and I have seen so much improvement.

I’ll get out of this funk. Maybe I just need a quick swim in our shark infested waters. Kidding, not kidding.


Well, the sharks will get your adrenalin up that’s for sure. Caffeinated chocolate is my current go-to.

Change is incremental in this business right? And like those shark waters - there might be a lot going on under the surface that we don’t see. Positive stuff, not shark stuff.


Everyone of us feel and understand the many losses associated with our childrens’s illness I find something for which to be thankful about her every day, no matter how smile. Her birthday is this week, and she gets sad. I doubt this is the life she would have grafted for herself. I will buy balloons at the dollar store, and I ordered a cake for the two of us. I know age will enjoy it. If I think about all she doesn’t have, I will be a wreck, and that is not good for her.


I pray every day for a cure !!! and so far i read the Niacin (vitamin b3 ) can really help but even that my son won’t take as he is paranoid about it … this brain disease is debilitating for our loved ones and all of us . One day at a time .


Thank you all for your responses. Even though I post my misery and perspective, I want all of you to know that Lou has the best court appointed attorney who specializes in cases of extreme circumstances. Before the assualt Lou was in a horrible accident, it was considered a hit and run, the driver of the pickup truck left the scene. Lou has and is still receiving the best care possible, due to the situation. We have been treated with nothing but kindness, compassion and top care. There is so much for our family to be thankful for in a time of grief and sadness.
One of the concerns at the present is that Lou may decompensate, that is one of the reasons this hearing of competency has taken months. Even though we are not privy to any info (Lou does not want to sign a release form) we know that he is not taking his medication regularly at the jails holding facility. This is a concern and at the same time the court will see his deteriorating stages, that is what the attorney has implied.
Thank you all so much, I’ve been able to keep some perspective through all of this because of your support.
The sleeplessness is still here, lots of praying and thoughts AnnieNorCal.
Edit: there are two situations that can happen at this point. Lou will go back to the state hospital for another period of time or he will go to trial. Such a terrible time for our family. I have not been able to tell my daughters. They are finally moving on with there own lives, just breaks my heart to have to give them more bad news.


I woke up this morning and thought it shouldn’t be about me. Like we are often told, its their journey. Thanks Cerium.


I am glad you are being treated with kindness and care.

It’s okay to wait to tell your daughters until you know the situation more fully.

It’s such a terrible catch-22. If they take medicine, they might get better enough to be prosecuted. If they don’t take it, the illness gets worse. It’s too much for anyone to go through.


I was worried about that too, but in my son’s case,they medicated him and made him “competent” (the bar is pretty low) so he could assist with his defense. The question was what was his mental state at the time the crime was committed? They looked at all the evidence, documentation of previous illness/symptoms/history, took statements from me, 2 psych evals, and I (the victim of the assault) kept repeating over and over to the prosecutor’s office that I would not press charges, what my son needed was mental health treatment. That, along with the best NGRI public defender we could get, was what got my son into the state hospital where he is getting very good care and treatment and is responding to both.
He was on minimal medication while he spent a year in jail and didn’t begin to get better until he got to the hospital.
Not Guilty by Reason of Insanity is, we feel, a better option than going to prison and receiving inadequate mental health care and treatment.
Hang in there, AnnieNorCal.


And as far as how I am today, I am relieved and hopeful. We found out yesterday that my son will move to another, less restrictive unit in the hospital, the next step in his treatment. He has been given more privileges, can walk about the building without an escort and go to the vending machines. He will get another counselor and a different treatment team on the new unit. And yesterday at a ward party, he was given an award for being a “role model”. I guess his Boy Scout training is paying off… :slight_smile:


Hello @WAmac,
So glad to hear good news. Always a welcome blessing. AnnieNorCal
Edit: I am very thankful to you for your comments. Shalom


How am I today? Today is my daughters birthday. I woke up early, went to the 99 cent store to get her balooons and stickers. One of my friends got her a gift. She has no friends. Zero. E erroneous abandoned her when she became ill. Friends, neighbors. I bought her a beautiful cake, and a new outfit. I lit a candle, and she was smiling. She seemed genuinely happy with the day. It is not the kind of day we Ishtar have imagined fir them celebrating their birthday, but it is a day that brings joy to her, through her head. All I really care about is to make her happy❤️


Happy birthday to your daughter, it’s nice to hear your daughter looks forward to some happier moments.


This is my understanding as well, although I agree this is very confusing. I have been advised that the SSA will look at the person’s work history and if he has ever performed substantial gainful work activity (SGA) where he earned more than $1000 per month, then he may not be eligible for SSDI. If income is minimal, then they will look at medical documentation (not just a diagnosis) prior to age 22. This might enable a person to qualify for SSDI based on a parent’s work credits (if person himself does not have enough work credits) and if so, eligible to be able to collect when a parent is _receiving_emphasized text__his or her own SSI retirement benefits. I am hoping to work toward this in a few years.


I understand. At this point I just want peace and some degree of happiness for our loved one. Happy Birthday to your Daughter!


Happy birthday to your daughter , my son has no friends aswell but he has me😄just like your daughter has you !


@Gursevak14, thank you for your good wishes and reminder that our children do have their mother’s to watch over them.


Your welcome ,yes long live us!:heart:


Today is one of those days that’s difficult to communicate with my wife. She is talking to the voices and I cant get her attention very much.

Its these days that are the hardest when I cant really communicate with her and all I hear about is whatever crazy thoughts she has in her head.

Her doc just added fanapt to her other stuff. As we have found yet another way that doesnt work.

Last 4 months have been really hard on both of us. She just wants her piece and quiet back.

Thanks to this community. I just fit mb d you guys last week, but everyone here that I’ve interacted with has been very helpful and friendly


Your wife is lucky to have you in her life ,we have to be patient with our loved ones❤️


I hope this current time ends soon. Occasionally my son gets stuck in a bad phase for a couple of months. Hard on us and them when it happens.