Thoughts and prayers with you all!!
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Hey Sando! Thanks for coming and sorry you’re here but it’s great to hear from you… often times there are newer folks that may not understand why we bring humor (however dark, dry, sarcastic, tasteless or ruthless) to this forum. Sometimes they’re offended, appalled even, baffled at our callousness… but it’s a mark of a strong and passionate caregiver. At some point, when we’ve been at it long enough, there’s just nothing left to do but laugh away a tear, throw our flailing hands up in the air and laugh at the the excitingly catastrophic reality that is ours with our loved ones. Good stuff. Thank you for starting the thread!
I apologize it took me awhile to respond. I took myself on a short hiatus to try and enrich my catastrophic reality with all things seasonally rich and spirited and embed it into our home…(my MI partner of 10+ years).
Thanks for showing and sharing. I’ll ponder the topic a bit more and return… thank you!
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OMGosh Hope… ahhahahaha… lol… I AM SO sorry!.. that’s… I’m almost crying… lol
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It’s par for course here. Weather the storms. And those storms seem to break primarily with a target trajectory of just over MY head… this seems common with MI. The people/places they are most comfortable with, kind of catch 22 because the consistency of daily life and love and support we offer I believe and it seems in our case anyways has been singularly instrumental in bring my MI partner to be able to live a reasonably ‘normal’ life, succeeding from ‘constant crisis’ I call it to a few minor episodes a week…
Thanks Wisdom! It is certainly a journey very few will take. And one that none of us could imagine.
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Reading what you write must be one of the most sad yet inspiring writings I’ve read on this forum. Sad because of the reality of it but inspiring because of the massive amount of hope it projects.
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Thanks Terraformy! Sharing our pain - with people who can relate - is a powerful healer. We often feel so alone in this horrible pain. We can’t discuss it freely at work, with friends, or even with family. They don’t know what to say and usually say something stupid that makes me want to slap them 
.
But here, we know. We live it daily. Hourly. Waiting for the phone to ring and dreading if it’s another bad update. (Our son went AMA and left treatment? He was caught with drugs? He’s at a homeless shelter in Kipsigi? WTH?? ).
I believe our paths in life make us stronger. And those few, frazzled 1%’s on this journey together are ESPECIALLY bad ass!! We find hope under the tiniest speck of dirt. We find love from fellow caregivers. We find healing in stories of those that were diagnosed that now live lives worth living.
And we believe. Some how. Some way. In spite of the overwhelming circumstances and statistical reality… we press on. Keep the faith!
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Sorry I missed this! He’s aware of the diagnosis. But disagrees vehemently. Believes his delusions are because he’s a rainbow child with an upgraded consciousness. But, he seems to accept that this treatment plan is the only option that allow him to stay on mom/dad’s nickel.
No, he’s never not recognized me. But, after a few minor episodes would tell me that it wasn’t him. It was evil spirits inside him. #lockthedooratnight!
Hang in there and thanks for sharing.
Yes… we all can in different ways. What are you doing for him to CHANGE this so it doesn’t happen again to him or YOU ?
LEAP therapy. Loving affirmation of some things without blanket validation of all things.
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My son landed back in the hospital last night. I just spoke to him and he said this girl from a TV show is his best friend. Hopefully, they can get him back on his medication. He thinks he is in the “drunk tank” and won’t let him go. Oddly, though he does know that he is back in the hospital.
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Ever since the last full moon, my son has been off the deep end. It’s happened numerous times and once before, during one of his screaming episodes, I walked outside and began to pray that God would protect my son’s mind and keep us both safe. I looked up and saw that it was a full moon and laughingly said “Oh, never mind, Lord, I get it.”
I don’t know if anyone else notices the correlation to the full moon but I dread that time each month. Yesterday, out of nowhere, my son began his rampage by saying that I had removed his organs and that his real name was “whatever, whatever”. After he ranted for about 15 minutes, I pretended to doze off on the couch. He then came over, tapped me on the leg, and asked if I wanted to get something to eat. Flipped like a light switch. But was up before 6:30 this a.m. with rap music blaring in the garage. The nasty attitude is still there but now he wants to go buy new shoes and eat breakfast.
I have too many “top this” stories - 'even thought about writing a book from a caregiver’s perspective but only other caregivers would believe me. @Sando I’ve given away hatchets and knives and hidden many other things that can be considered weapons but not a single baseball. 
I’m just hoping things level off. He needs to be in the state mental hospital again but it takes an act of congress and nerves of steel to get him there.
Have a good day, everyone! 
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I would never count that out. I have noticed hormonal changes affect my sza loved one
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The only way I can wrap my head around some of the bizarre issues and adventures we’ve experienced with our son is to know we’re not alone. It doesn’t make sense. To anyone but us!! Keep the faith all of you CareWarriors!!
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I swear so many aspects of this illness reminds me of an actual physical brain injury. My father-in-law, who has since passed, was in a car accident when my husband was young and suffered a severe and permanent brain injury. After we were married my husband became his dad’s legal guardian and caretaker (yes, my husband lost his father and has now essentially lost our son). Anyway, sometimes his dad would get really angry over something, to the point of clenched fists and face turning beet red and a minute later he would be laughing and joking like nothing ever happened.
My son ended up in so many car accidents that weren’t his fault that I could swear he had a bullseye painted on the car. Two accidents sent him into or through the windshield; once the police tasered him face down in the street and cracked all his teeth (later had to be cut out) and I’m sure causing the brain to bounce back and forth in his skull; and the last time he was pummeled on the base of his neck by a young, unprofessional officer who was sitting on my son (who’s hand were underneath him) and his face in charcoal lighter fluid that the officer knocked over. The psych unit called to see how he got the bruising on his forehead and I told them it was the police. Some are ill trained to handle Baker Acts and when they ask me to “step inside so they can handle the situation”, that’s when I stay right there and tell them I’m there to protect my son’s rights. So all that to say that I firmly believe head injuries either contribute to or trigger the problems.
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Oh this breaks my heart AND makes me incredibly angry. Very sorry for all that pain.
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I am so so sorry for the way your son was treated! Breaks my heart how people with MI are treated. We have to take care of them the best way we can. They are defenseless and need us.
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