I meant Threat not treat
Yes, in most cases this is true. It is the situation with my daughter. I wish it weren’t.
Good for you for caring about him. It is frustrating for sure to try and help someone with schiz who won’t medicate.
In some places its different, not for me, here its the same. I think its hard for people who live in places where their family members can get help, to understand that for us and our family members there is no help in our situations.
It really sucks what you are going through. You did such a nice thing by taking him in. I hope things take a turn for the better soon here for you.
When my son was committed for the third time, the doctor told me that he thought it would be best to get him court-ordered to take medication. My son did not have anything documented that really showed he was (at the time) a threat to himself or others. So the doc took the "gravely disabled’ route. Usually standards for inpatient commitment will vary by state, but I’ve noticed that at least one statute will require that an individual is either (and this is key) a threat to himself or others or gravely disabled.
The Treatment Advocacy website, not sure of you’ve already visited, goes into detail how each state defines the term.
Thank you for that. I asked/requested the court to require med compliance when they released him the last time from jail, they did not do it, only ordered it thru probation which is very loosely monitored. They basically left it up to me and it is certainly out of my expertise and causes a lot of resentment from him by me trying to enforce that. He is so deep in his sickness now that he trusts no one and insists there is nothing wrong with him. He is in danger of being homeless as he has been removed from my home by probation and now resides with my mother and my husband who rent together as we are separated, although the 3 of us have totally supported him thus far. He becomes violent and enraged quickly at times with his frustration/delusions. I have enquired about options regarding lack of self care, but again he portrays himself well in front of law enforcement and Dr.s. His therapist is totally aware of his delusions/illness but has no authority to request anything unless he states he is in danger of hurting himself or others in front of her, which he will not do of course. He was just told by probation if he does not contact mental health and make appt. he will be violated and back in jail as a last resort but that does not seem to phase him either? The next step is homeless, he has no family besides us and no other supports, so this is heartbreaking. I do not know what else to do.
I agree totally and appreciate your frustration. I just read this from journalist Pete Early. Worthy read and invaluable advice:
While my state has a lot of the correct words on the books, they receive an “F” grade from the Treatment Advocacy website because the judges don’t apply the law changes in real life. We work to get the laws changed, only to have the judges ignore the changes.
So frustrating. This is an additional reason for us to keep learning and to get involved with advocacy and/or help support those organizations that do. Even sharing informational articles on social media will help educate our families, friends, and the public.
That’s so not right, hope. The court systems are failing so many with this illness.
@hope We live in Texas and it is damned near impossible to get someone committed to a hospital until they actually kill someone. So wrong.
If the people of Texas understood the problem and how badly Texas treats it’s people with brain disorders, things would change. But no one really understands it at all, not even close.
Thank you so much, Hope, for posting this article. In my opinion, it is the simplest and best advice for those facing severe mental illness in a family member. I wish I had known these 8 points from the beginning of this journey. It took me so long to learn each of these points, and especially to learn to have hope.
NAMI should hand out this article at Family to Family.
Just a little update from me. As many of you know I have been unmedicated now for years, and it has been quite a struggle for me, and I still hear voices, still have both positive and negative symptoms, but I have insight into my disease, which is the most important thing so that I can realize that the voices are not real, that sometimes my thoughts are paranoid delusions. I have learned what to do and say, and more importantly what not to do and what no to say, to keep out of trouble. I want to echo what others have said here about their kids not living with them… it helped me so much getting out of my parents’ house. I have been living with my boyfriend and my life has been so much better. I think from my point of view, the hardest part of living with my parents is that they always wanted me to go back to the teenage version of me before I got sick, but I can’t get back there. There really is no cure, no recovery, I just learned how to deal with it and live with it, but I can’t get back to where I was before the voices started. And the way they looked at me, I know they loved me and they meant well, but I couldn’t stand the way their eyes looked at me because they were always looking for that part of me that just wasn’t there anymore.
As for the discussion about the meds, yes, I’ve read studies where antipsychotics are linked to metabolic syndrome which leads to insulin resistance, weight gain, diabetes, and cardiovascular disease, so yeah, they will shorten your life. But I would still take them if they actually did me much good and didn’t make me feel so horrible. The akathisia and tardive dyskinesia I experienced on them was terrible. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone. The supplement I found the most helpful is called N-A-C. It is cheap, over the counter form of sulfur that is readily absorbed by the body and seems to detoxify the brain. It has helped increase my insight to where I am better able to tell when I am slipping into delusional thinking and then take the proper steps to correct it.
The other thing that helped a lot of was Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Without the skills I learned in CBT (and DBT as well), I would be struggling so much more than I am now.
I’m still working part-time and attending I.T. classes at my local community college. I should have a certificate in I.T. by mid 2019, and maybe I can get a better job then.
Its so very good to have an update from you!
Thank you for all the topics you chimed in on, your experiences are always extremely helpful.
I plan to take quite seriously your thoughts about how your parents have looked at you. I really needed to hear this. I need to look at my son to see him and embrace him as he is today. While I can understand my heart wanting to see the past, the same heart needs to love and celebrate the present more.
Thanks for the big dose of hope, congratulations on your continued progress and best wishes as you move forward. You have made my day:)
Sigh. I am so sorry you feel this frustrated.
You have educated yourself about this illness, taken action, given support … when no one else would help him. I think you have perhaps tried the best that you could. Hopefully, you can find some comfort in that as the future unfolds for him.
Thank you, this forum has helped me a lot to know I am not alone and every body’s kind words have helped tremendously. Last week he got a job with help from a friend of mine who is Director of Veterans program who assist Veterans find jobs that have criminal backgrounds. He has managed to get there 4 days in row now. I have committed to helping with his gas money to get him there if he continues, when I saw him yesterday to do this, he was rambling on about how he went to the FBI building to file complaint about the sheriffs following/harassing him and he then went to the Sheriff dept. to do the same. He rambled on about how people come into the house while he is sleeping and spray meds on him and also while he is in shower. Insists they implanted a GPS in him while he was in custody previously, it goes on and on. I remember the posts here and no longer try to prove he is wrong but try to change the subject and stay calm. I got him gas for his car and drove off in tears as I remember so fondly how he use to be and not sure what has triggered this severity. He has had a rough life from the start and I know he has fought this in his past. My heart breaks as all these people deserve a better quality of life. I know I have done all I can but does not take away the pain. I can only envision him healthy and happy with positive energy.
Congratulations. That is awesome. You should be very proud of yourself. I am sure it is not easy. You are a great role model for others. Have you ever considered being and advocate for this topic, it would be helpful to others and probably yourself.
Thank you for sharing! It is so encouraging to get words of hope from someone living with this brain disorder, as well as your perspective. I am so glad that you have insight and a quality of life.
Thank you for posting your story. I am happy that you are progressing toward your goals! Getting a better job after college will have long term good effects.
I just looked up N-A-C as I’d never heard of it. Perhaps my daughter will try it. Here is a quote from a site I just looked at:
“N-A-C is a form of the essential amino acid cysteine, something used by the body to make glutathione (GSH), one of the body’s most important antioxidants. In fact, all the benefits of N-A-C are due to the fact that it boosts the blood levels of GSH”
Thanks for the tip.