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Just beginning to learn..sharing my story


#21

I’m really sorry. When my son became physical I remember feeling scared but not so much for myself, still for him.

I don’t understand the pin thing. I recall needing a pin when my son was a minor that they gave us when he was admitted. We had to give it to get info and such. Is he an adult? If so, they should just be able to ask him if he wants to see or talk to you.

I have taken classes at NAMI and they have been real helpful. It was good to talk to ppl going through the same things and the group seems to gain strength from eachother.

I hope this hospitalization is productive and helpful for your son. Please try and rest, drink plenty of water and take care of yourself.


#22

you have nothing to feel sorry or guilty for. You are to be encouraged for being a caring mother. My son is adopted and his birth mom was sever mental problems and I knew to be aware of the possibility of my son having the genes.BUT I did not think it would be age age 13 !!! He made it until age 18 before telling me he wanted to go to Helen Ross McNabb. They have worked w/ him in adjusting his meds. He has just finished his GED classes and has started Career Center for tutors,job placement,encouragement, and they pay him $280/month. Like u say -he and I are so excited. My son has always made good choices w/ friends,and lif changes decisions. As long as he is on his meds.
Hang in there and just love him. My son will be 20 an every day I tell him “I need a hug” an I get one


#23

@sweetc, thank you for sharing your story. I hope and pray for our health (I, too, am diabetic) so that we are able to support and be voices for our children.


#24

I’m so sorry you had to go through this. I think the first few times are just so Traumatic for the parents that we don’t know what to do. One thing to try to remember is that they don’t know your situation either and if you can try to stay calm and reasonably and rationally ask them to encourage him to call home and give you the pin number. After that you can talk to him.

I had to file an MIW on my son to get him treatment. I also filed for guardianship at the suggestion of his Pdoc. It took me over a year to realize it. The attorney went to interview him and his attorney pretty much told the courts that he was not able to take care of himself. I had to tell them the concerns I had and it was granted.

Even with guardianship you have to be the one to ask for information. I’m always asking what medicine is he on now and they don’t call me when they change it. When he’s in the hospital especially the state hospital they are in charge. Best of luck to you and don’t give up.


#25

@Mom2, thank you for encouraging words and information.


#26

Update on my son: My son was released from the Mental Institution on Tuesday. He seemed to be stabilized but my son that I know is still not there. Am I being too optimistic if I said that one day, that day will come? Tuesday, he slept okay but next day, I already begin to see something not right. Either I’m becoming too overly aware or paranoid of my son’s change in behaviors. Am I becoming too overbearing for my son if I remind him too often to let me know if he is feeling any side affects from new meds?

He was released with prescribed medications Risperdal and Benadryl. He didn’t sleep on Wednesday. On Thursday, he only slept for few hours. I’m beginning to worry that his insomnia will lead to another psychotic episode. Tonight, he went to bed hoping to sleep but he came out around 9:30 pm stating that he couldn’t sleep 'cause too many things going through his head.

Have any of you used any oil diffuser to help your love ones with their sleep? If you have, did it work?
I’ve set an oil diffuser in my son’s room tonight with a lavender oil hoping that this will help him calm down and help him to fall asleep. I also rubbed oil on bottom of his feet as well. I may be going overboard here but nothing to lose by trying, right? He has been in his room trying to sleep about 30 mins ago and I’ve not seen him come out so hope it is a good news.

Hoping and praying that this weekend, he will be calm and stable. His appointment with a new outpatient psychiatrist is Monday so, I’m hoping this time, he is much better than the last outpatient psychiatrist my son saw.


#27

Your son is there; the symptoms are maybe more apparent right now, like a camouflage. I promise you he is there.

I’ve also heard rosemary oil in a diffuser to help concentration, so that might be a good day or morning oil.

One idea to try is a kind of conversation ratio. 9 out of 10 conversations have nothing to do with diagnosis, medicine, or side effects, unless he brings it up. Or 5 out of 6 or whatever, but most of the time, try for subjects that both of you are interested in or have to do with things that are happening, like deciding together what’s on the grocery list and what meals sound good.

Sleep is incredibly important. It’s good he has a doctor’s appt Monday and can bring it up.

I hope for a good weekend and that the new doctor is good.


#28

Yeah I find that keeping things light, talking about current goings on and our shared interests gets the best reaction from my son and keeps him in the here and now.

I learned early on not to ask him about his illness. Just makes him angry. Sometimes if I see troublesome behaviors I give him the parental eye, which he recognizes as such, and I say “Are you all right?” And so far, get gets honest with me at that point. But thankfully, it hasn’t come to that but for a few times.

I am taking the path of least resistance on most everything. He cleans up after himself about a third of the time but he does empty the dishwasher regularly. Had to set a firm boundary about coffee making in the middle of the night though. It was waking my husband and me up! And so far, my son has honored that request.


#29

Update on my son’s progress. We saw his new outpatient doctor on 6/12 and she decided to start him on Abilify replacing Risperdal and that did not go too well. My son was very depressed and started pacing and not sleeping then he started hearing voices. I’ve tried to reach his doctor but all I got was voice messages. So, on Monday I called crisis hotline and they sent mobile unit to my house to assess him. On their advice, I took him to hospital (mental facility clinic). Thank goodness, my son went willingly.

When I saw my son on Wednesday, he was not doing too well. I found out, they gave him Prozac and I was so furious as this was one of the medicine he took before which put him into hospital the last time. How can they be so careless when I gave them the print-out list of medication history?

I went to visit my son today and he seemed a little better, that is, he was not pacing but he was still talking to voices. He was saying he and all of us were going to hell and that he was antichrist. He said that an angel was telling him that. He fell on his knees and started to cry. I inquired about what he is being administered and nurse was kind to let me know. And, I was surprised that Dr is giving my son the same meds which my son took as very first meds when he was admitted to mental facility for the first time back in May. Is this normal? I was so furious that all the emotions that I have been suppressing came over me and I started crying and told them how was that possible. A nurse told me that this time around, it is not tablet form but it is fast dissolving under the tongue med. Given 2 times a day.

They have started giving him Zyprexa, Cogentin and Benadryl.

Within 8 weeks since all this madness started, my son has been on so many different meds. It seems as though every 2 wks. Is this norm when you are first diagnosed and they are trying to find right meds that works? And he has been in and out of hospital 3 times so far.

During the weekend, a visitation hours are 2 hours so I’m hoping and praying that tomorrow when I see him, he will be in much improved state.


#30

They do try a lot of different meds sometimes.

I hope you have a good visit this weekend.


#31

@Hereandhere, thank you and I wish you and your love one peaceful and fantastic weekend.


#32

I’d rather they keep trying if they don’t see any response rather than stubbornly stick with the same thing.

I usually see my son show some improvement about 3 days from the time he goes in the hospital, so hopefully you’ll see something similar.

Zyprexa did well for my son for a long time.


#33

I see your frustration and sometimes it does take a few attempts to get the right medicine. Hopefully he’ll see improvement soon. Hang in there.


#34

My son has been going to partial day program from 8 am to 4 pm during the week since he has been out from inpatient facility. So, for me, a little weight is lifted for now. It has been pretty calm and my son has been adjusting to new meds pretty well. But things got crazy yesterday after my son’s visit to his dad during the weekend. Something must have triggered him. I wish I knew what it was that made my son drastically spiral down. When his dad dropped him off, I already could see that something was not right. He went into rage…it was scary. Thank goodness for my dog who started barking at my son that stopped him. Next time, I don’t think that I will be able to forgive my son if he hurts me again.

After he ate the dinner, he seemed to be doing better. He was eating as if he has been starving this past few days. I don’t think I can trust my ex with my son. This is not the first time when he came home after spending time with his dad, my ex, which my son’s behavior changed drastically. My son is doing better today. A doctor who is overseeing him at the day program has been adjusting his meds so hopefully, he will find the right combination and dosage for my son. My son is currently on Zyprexa, Cogentin and Depakote DR. So far, these combination of meds have been keeping him stable and I don’t see him talking to voices anymore.

It only has been 2.5 months since all this madness started but it seems as though it has been forever ago. Still trying very hard to stay strong, hoping and praying.


#35

I wonder if your son suppresses his symptoms around his dad? I know my son has had an outburst of symptoms after being in a situation where he suppresses.

Glad he is doing better, and really glad the dog was there for you.


#36

My son goes into these rages periodically and it is scary. He seems to be able to control them; however. I have come in the house when I’ve been away and I can hear him just screaming. If he realizes someone is home, he will stop. It’s good your son is going to a partial day program. Don’t know of one like that arond here. Take care and praying for you and all those dealing with family members like ours daily.