The person in question is my oldest sister (Q). My family has suspected something off about her for a while now; mainly she has always been paranoid, especially with money. Our biggest tip-off was when she told us she thought her coworkers could read her mind. No one really knew how to breach the subject.
Anyway, about two years ago on Christmas we had a huge family… argument? Incident? Q is very confrontational and during the whole week around Christmas she had been getting into a fight with just about everyone; My mother and my older brother and sister, mainly. My dad and I were the only ones who weren’t involved in a “heated” discussion.
Long story short: she overhears me talking to my boyfriend about our suspicions with her paranoid tendencies; my brother intervenes by physically placing himself between us; they struggle; brother manages to push her away; she trips and bruises her ankle. The next day we, as in my siblings and I, confront Q about her behaviour (being set off by the smallest things and the paranoid tendencies). It doesn’t go well at all. Thankfully my older sister lives on her own, so my brother and I left and spent the weekend with her. I haven’t spoken to her since.
So now, two years later, I’m thinking of initiating contact with her. Given the context of our estrangement, I’m not really sure how to approach it. My older sister invited her to lunch when she was in Q’s neck of the woods and basically got an e-mail calling her the scum of the earth for the Christmas incident. I realise that I may be met with anger or a letter that calls me the scum of the earth, but at the very least I think it would help me move on from the incident. I think, even after two years, I’m having trouble processing what happened.
The worst part is I’m not even sure how to begin if I wrote a letter. Q was angry that I “talked behind her back” to “someone she didn’t know” (i.e. boyfriend I’ve been seeing for 2 years~ at that point and she met on a few occasions). When we were, uh, “talking”, I don’t believe there were any other transgressions. I apologised to her about talking behind her back, even though I thought I didn’t do anything wrong. As far as I can tell, I already told her I was sorry for the things that might’ve hurt her.
If you guys have any feedback or comments, it would be greatly appreciated.