Hi - you might want to read through our old discussion forums messages just to learn more from people who had grown up in a similar situation:
http://www.schizophrenia.com:8080/jiveforums/category.jspa?categoryID=8
I know that my mom put up with a lot of abuse from the two men in her life. She was so insecure and afraid of being alone that being abused was preferable to being alone.
I know this may be late, but my father also enables my mother in a way that yours does. He steps me aside and tells me he will try everything in his power to get her help, and even try and slip her some medication in her food to bring her to family gatherings against their request because she refuses she’s ill and doesn’t take her meds. I am an only child, and I have a three year old now, and I don’t want her exposed to my mother unless she gets help. I’ve been very clear with my dad about visitations, and I he’ll still go against my word, lie to me that it’s only him, and surprise! There’s my mother barging her way through the door to see my daughter. She doesn’t even know my daughters name and only calls her “baby”. It’s heartbreaking. I try so hard to give my dad as much information as I could, and eventually I finally moved across country because my emotional state from her was affecting me physically. My father loves her unconditionally, through all of this, and even now he’s not caring for himself and I believe it’s rubbing off on him that he’s not sure what to believe is sane. It’s sickening, and it hurts me how great of a heart he has but he wont care for himself properly by getting her help. She has been calling me and she saw me the day I left, yet still goes to my old house and thinks I’m there. She got a hold of my number and keeps leaving me nasty threatening voicemails. When I tell my dad about it he tells me not to worry about it. I don’t want to cut him off, it’s hard being this far away from him cause I do love him, but I’m sick of him brushing her actions under the carpet and act like everything is fine.
Mine was. Just found this forum today. I’m sorry we have to share this experience and sadness.