Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

Clueless what to do


#1

My brother is 21 and has been paranoid sz for about 2 years now. He was living with our mom and grandmother until last night. He talks to himself a lot. He smiles for no reason.

He isolates himself all the time. He stays up late turning lights on and off and going outside to smoke. He isnt a harm to himself but he has threatened our mom a couple of times. Lately, he has had real issues with what he looks like. He has thought his neck is to long, his arms are out of socket, his skull is shrinking and his shin looks different than all of ours. He tells us nothing is wrong with him. Clearly, he has to be lying. I dont know how he could think that.

Bc he want get help, he had to leave their house. Last night our aunt and uncle dropped him off downtown at a Out Reach place (A church), gave him his bag, a hug and told him we loved him. She said he stood there as they drove off. She felt like he probably thought they were coming back to get him. Breaks my heart! He has a phone but had no minutes on it. It pissed me off bc i dont think he even knows how to buy minutes for his phone. Someone should have done thay for him.

We dont know where he is. His phone has no minutes and his is sz. Wont get help, wont take meds. I think my family hopes this will make him realize he needs help. Not sure if this is the beat way to do it.

My mom just called me and said my brother called her and said he walkes for about 20 miles last nt and he needs a ride somewhere. My mom refused. She told me to call him on some #. I did and the phone is turned off. Now what will happen!!?


#2

I would pray for him and put a prayer request in for him. He’s at Gods mercy now.


#3

Can u not get him into hospital?


#4

Shelly, he want go. He doesn’t see why he should bc he doesn’t think anything is wrong with him. Im going crazy not knowing where he is.
I have been praying. A lot. Its cold and im worrying.

He went to the doctor once in atl. He agreed he needed help. Got checked in for 4 days. Then the docs just let him out. He was pissed! He didnt know he was going to have to stay at the hospital. He wont go back.


#5

Call homeless shelters and p

olice.


#6

So they dropped him off downtown like a dog. How cruel !


#7

Somehow I thought that it would not be surprising at all if he does not want to have anything to do with your relatives because that is not the way you deal with szs. How cruel !


#8

I have a sz cousin in Sweden and he used to come to Finland in the past and stay at the house of my aunt and so on, at least they had enough intelligence that they, my aunt etc., bought him a ticket back to Sweden where he lived. They just did not drop him off somewhere. Streets in America can be dangerous.


#9

I wonder how will he live now without money, without his mind…I hope one day they pay it back!! That’s very bad what they 've done!!


#10

Chances are he has anosognosia.

http://forum.schizophrenia.com/t/anosognosia-article/12157

As a parent I have taken my son to a shelter and dropped him off… Not one of my finer moments however sometimes parents/caregivers run out of options.

I don’t know if using LEAP could help to get your brother to see someone.
http://www.leapinstitute.org/ - under resources are free videos on using LEAP
LEAP is a way of communicating to build trust. Listen-Empathize-Agree-Partner.

http://dramador.com/ - Dr. Xavier Amador is a clinical psychologist whose brother had schizophrenia. He is the founder of the LEAP Institute. Wrote the book: I’m Not Sick I Don’t Need Help! Can buy from his website.
Search Xavier Amador and LEAP on youtube.com and you should find some long videos

http://ourhealthyminds.com/family-handbook/communication/Building-a-collaborative-relationship-leap.html
Building A Collaborative Relationship “LEAP”

Do you know if there are any crisis outreach teams in your area that could evaluate him and if needed take him to the hospital?


#11

I agree. Me and my husband felt like they shoukd have done more. So the night they dropped him off, we couldnt stand it. My husband spents hours and hours walking the streets down town looking for him! He never found him. My brother called my mom the next day and told her he walked about 15-20 miles and he was at a waffle house around walmart anf race track. (No rd names). He told her he got a cheap room for the night. I was So proud of him. I didnt know if he could think straight enough to do that. Anyway… i tried to call him on the # he called my mom but the phone was turned off.
My relatives did try and try to help him. Tried to get him to go to the hospital. He refused! Over and over again. They just couldnt let him stay there anymore. They didnt know what else to do.


#12

Have you considered one of the newer antipsychotic injections?

Has he ever seen a psychologist for CBT etc! More importantly family therapy, as leaving someone on the streets clearly isn’t the answer! It sounds more like a command task.


#13

First of allcontact law enforcement and see how long before he can be classified as a missing person. Also call jails and hospitals. He may end up arrested or committed. I would try to talk to someone in ER. When you find him make sure he has a phone with a plan that can add family locator. With that you can get longitude and latitude coordinates for his location. Once you find him he might be so grateful that you can get him to agree to see a doctor in exchange for your protection. Would you and your husband let him stay with you for a while. I am praying. We all need so much help that just doesn’t exist. These are the situations in our country that the high percentage of homeless mentally ill. oh, also call homeless shelters, if there are any in the area.


#14

Also, in my state, once threatened your mom has 48 hours to have him committed. A hospital stabilization unit is not ideal, but it’s a lot better than wandering the streets.


#15

We found him last night and brought him to our house. Im trying to figure out how to ask him to go seek help at the crisis center. I hope he will agree to go so he want have to go back to the shelter.


#16

Great news. Now - the goal can be to get him into better treatment.

We cover this issue in many questions in our Frequently Asked Questions area:

http://schizophrenia.com/family/faqindex.htm

I also recommend you talk to NAMI if you have a chapter in your city:

http://www.nami.org/Template.cfm?Section=Your_Local_NAMI&Template=/CustomSource/AffiliateFinder.cfm


#17

John Hinckley’s psychiatrist told his parents to give him $100.00 and drop him off at the shelter. (In case you don’t remember, John Hinckley was the guy who shot President Reagan.) That didn’t turn out so well. If a person can’t cope with living with his mother he probably can’t cope with living on the street. You need to find another way to shock him to his senses.


#18

What if you put it to him just like that? So thankful you found him. God is good!


#19

My reply was out of order. What I meant is what if you tell him you don’t want him to go back to the shelter, but if he wants to stay with you he has to see a doctor?


#20

@mamakaye, @crimby he agreed to go to the hospital last night. He talked with the phyciatrist there and they decided they needed to keep him. They put a 1013 on him so he couldnt leave. They are trying.to find a place to put him. We are so glad he isnt on the street!!