I’m sorry but my feelings are completely different… Because I feel like a failing FATHER! 
Welcome to the Forum! And to the 1%!!
Dear I am worried,
I think after stopping the meds for a year and putting him back on them makes the person very tired and takes time for the body and the brain to stabilize again, I’ve seen that with my son; I have seen the extremes and they’re very unpleasant; my son was doing very well on the abilify shot, but he decided not to take it anymore unfortunately! It took about 6 months to stabilize him and he was all bones refusing to eat anything properly, he was just nibbling and not sleeping at all, jus napping here and there because he was always on guard before taking the meds, it was heartbreaking as you said seeing him like that.
I was happy to see him getting adequate hours of sleep in bed instead of just sitting down on the couch bending over or at the table hitting his head and falling from the chair and not letting his body and brain to rest properly; now all that time spent to stabilize him and after couple of months going back to the same thing: stopping the meds!!!
He (my son) doesn’t eat at home probably out of paranoia, not enticed at all by me cooking his favorite foods, he’s a very good eater when on the meds but without them he’s not eating well; I know he doesn’t like the taste of the water or some foods because the meds.
He used to be on haldol many years ago but too much of it made him agressive and he was on the edge and also he got very stiff, once he was like a walking stick and he fell forward, I got very concerned because I thought he was going to break his face.
These days I’d rather have him sleep more, I know it’s hard to spend life not doing more because of lack of energy; his doctor used to prescribe him an antidepressant also as an ‘energizer’.
I hope that as days go by and your son’s body adjusts to the meds he recovers to his baseline.
My best wishes. Take care of yourself too.
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My son won’t sign the papers that I am allowed to know what is going on with his psychiatrist either. She can’t talk to me, but I can talk to her. I text her every week to let her know that yet again the meds aren’t working. I tell her everything that he is doing and saying so that he can not lie to her about it. She needs to be informed of what is going on. Still praying that she will find the right med for him. I also cry a lot, this is no life for him.
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