Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

My Partner has SZ and is sick

Hi everyone.

I was wondering if you could help me, or offer some advice as I need help.

I was wondering if you could give me some advice about my partner. He is diagnosed with a personality disorder and PTSD. He spent over a year in prison and was quite poorly upon his release, so I took him to his GP who made a referral to our local community mental health team last year. We attended a few appointments and he was diagnosed with borderline schizophrenia. He has a history of self-harm and suicide attempts, but he has not made any attempts or self-harmed in the last 8 months.

Upon meeting the CMHT he was assessed and partially diagnosed, they planned for him to go on anti-psychotics once they got his blood pressure down, but he never went through with it, nor did he attend any further appointments. They did not chase him up to my knowledge, though my partner does lie and invent scenarios/situations/events.

We recently moved to the countryside and I hoped that might help, which it did at first and we were really happy, but now he is getting worse. We had a very stressful few months leading up to Christmas and I do think it has taken its toll on him. But he refuses to seek help or take any form of medication. He has started sleepwalking in the last few weeks, his attitude is cold, he keeps snapping at me and he is very aggressive. April is a particularly bad time as it relates to the origins of his PTSD, so I’m really worried it will get worse if combined with the PTSD symptoms.

He refuses to see that he his poorly, so I don’t know how to handle the situation. He is cold, very aggressive, has little or no interest in sex but is obsessed with porn, or he makes sexually explicit comments. He makes up these entire scenarios of violent revenge on people who have done him wrong. He keeps digging me out about every little thing I do, or making comments if I have messed something up, or forgotten to do something so I feel worthless right now. I love him and I know this is not his fault and I try so hard to keep a routine and stay positive, but I work full time 5 days a week and I’m currently doing around 3 hours of travelling a day. I can’t carry on like this, I’m struggling and feel so alone.

On top of all that I am not well mentally, I have a disorder so I’m trying to keep myself well otherwise he will see weakness, or we’ll both be sick and lose each other.

Thank you x

1 Like

Can you give some more details about the violent revenge scenarios he is telling you about?

Im sorry for what your going Thur…I know seems everyone here has or is going thru a lot…I’ll keep you and partner in prayers…wish I knew what to tell you or what to say …if I could I’d be able to help my husband…I wish you the best

One guy he said he is going to tie to a chair and set on fire. Another guy upset him last week, so he threatened to put him in the boot of his car, drive out to a wood, kill him and bury him. Another guy he is going to shoot in the face. It goes on.

When we first met he told me he was a hitman, he told me had killed over 14 people. He told me he was seeing his counsellor and would go in to graphic detail about what had happened in the sessions. Turns out he never attended any sessions for over a year. To be honest I don’t think he knows what is real and what is a fantasy sometimes. After he came out of jail he was different, he seemed ‘better’. Now he is under a lot of stress and I am worried. He has full blown conversations with the personality in his head, gets very upset when I go to work but seems fine when I am home.

My son will do better for a while after he moves to a new location also.

I am concerned about his revenge scenarios that he tells you about. Do you feel threatened when he tells you about them? Does he talk repeatedly about the same people in these revenge scenarios?

He does need to take the meds they wanted to prescribe, do you think he would take them if you asked him to do it for you?