My son isn't invited to family functions


#21

Same here. My son has been ignored by most of my family members. My parents tried to help him when they were alive, and two of my brothers tried as well. The others just pretend he’s not there. He’s not invited to reunions or weddings, and on the odd occasion where he does attend, they ignore him. He feels so uncomfortable and unwelcome that he retreats into a shell and doesn’t interact with them either. Since the last family gathering that he was not invited to, I haven’t attended either. I did ask one cousin why she didn’t invite him and she said she just didn’t want anyone to feel uncomfortable! That did it for me. Their ignorance and lack of compassion makes me sick. There’s nothing I can do about it, so I just don 't go.


#22

Yep!
My dad is an asshole and judges people with mental illness …
People in general need a level of understanding when being around schizophrenics…


#24

I am sorry that your family acts so cruel toward your son. I feel lucky to have family who welcome my son who has shizoaffective disorder. Even if he doesn’t attend very often, he is always included. Look for people who support you during good and bad times. Its wonderful to celebrate the good times with people you love.


#25

YES. Experience the same thing. I JUST texted my sis and BIL and asked if my son could come visit with me. Waiting for an answer. My 90 yo dad lives with them and I go visit. My son never gets to see his cousins etc. My dad does come stay with me at times, so they get to see each other. I do understand their view because at worse of times my son has stole stuff from my mom. She never blamed him , she knew he was sick.

Congratulations on you son doing so well! Have you asked if you could bring him ? What has made the difference with your son? How old is he?


#26

@Knows3939 This is so sad! It’s amazing how weird people can be about this illness that is nobody’s fault! I have some of both. My side of the family love my son (their nephew, cousin, uncle, etc. ) and are very supportive of me and they’re thrilled to see him, whenever they can. Unfortunately, my 30 year old son has not done anything since his diagnosis of paranoid schizophrenia five years ago. He’s had two hospitalizations. He lives with his dad (my ex) My ex husband’s family have never reached out to me or to my son. This is his only living grandparent, my ex mother in law and many cousins, aunts and uncles. It made me really angry at first and I wanted to lash out at them. I didn’t though. His dad is pretty much estranged from his own family now. I just don’t understand! They’re not bad people, in fact I have always adored them! I can’t believe they never ask how he’s doing or anything! You’re not alone in this situation. Horrible :frowning: enough but then to just be forgotten …


#27

So true. Our children (and adult children) suffer and we as mothers especially suffer an excruciating pain and sadness that people who aren’t in our shoes can never understand. I am soooo sad ALL THE TIME for my son :frowning: and I see no end to my crying.


#28

My son too is alone. He lives with his dad and sister and she’s a single mom of twins five years old. I live outside city limits in the country. We are his world. Such a lonely life for our MI loved ones.


#29

My heart :heart:️ goes out to both of you. My daughter has had schizophrenia for for five years. I do not know what I would have done if family was not helping. I’m in my 70’s and she was a midlife child. I have 4 other daughters, and sisters all helping. She is doing very well on the Envega shot once a month. It keeps me busy, we have a tight schedule to keep her mind off the voices. Yoga, swimming, walking, painting, and. two social activities a week. My oldest daughter was the one who suggested she might have schizophrenia after she dropped out of life, and had paranoia. I think when family members do not understand the illness / or will not try then this is their loss. My daughter teaches us all something new, and great fullness. You are doing right to put your energies toward your son.


#30

They could all learn wonderful things from your son if they tried. Most schizophrenia are very smart, they may have social anxiety that makes them seem slow, and the meds they care they will educate themselves​:rage::rage: