It has gotten easier for me with my sz son....at 2 years into treatment I was still much like you, lacking personal joy and purely on autopilot, My son is 33 now and is well into probably 7 or 8 full years of steady effective treatment and things are better with each passing year, not so much because my son does more with his life but because I have accepted that he is content with his own limitations and his limitations were only making me miserable and sad, not him. I started out (once I saw that the meds were working for him), I was trying to get him to get his GED and try to work part time and get his driver license and talking about all kinds of things that would eventually lead to him living on his own again and each time I pressed him on these things--his progress would stop and in some cases the delusions and confusion would return.
My son is happy and stable on a very simple and uncomplicated daily routine that I orchestrate. He gets up and eats, takes his meds, watches a little TV and goes for a long walk or goes to the gym nearby depending on the weather and usually I go too. After that he goes with me to run errands, pay bills, shop or go to doctor's appointments, whatever is on the agenda that day. We may also make a stop at a local park or go to a farmer's market or local festival, whatever is happening. Later he checks his bird feeders we have out back, maybe waters the trees, he also recycles everything he can, paper, cans, plastic etc...he may do a few household chores on some days and then he watches TV the rest of the evening and smokes outside with a neighbor....he stays up late and sleeps in.
On occasion he will skip TV and go to his room and listen to music and look at his coin collection. He is so set in his pattern now and so stable with it that I can often go off and do my own thing for the better part of a day and he is fine. He will text me with questions and always ask when I will be back but he manages okay. When I am out of the equation he may skip exercise that day or he may not eat as balanced that day, or he may smoke more cigarettes and watch more TV that day but he is still okay and I am still off doing my own thing which gives me back my personal joy. In a couple of weeks I am driving about 5 hours away to see my best friend from high school and I am spending a night (or two) with her so we can catch up. This will be a first for me in 12 years....I am excited and nervous and my son is the same, he feels very positive that things will be fine and he is happy that I am trusting him. Am I scared, yes I am but it is just an old habit that will take a long time to go away if ever. I think he can do it and I know I can do it.
I have wondered so much about whether my son mourns the loss of the things he doesn't do, lack of friends, lack of a social life, lack of a job, lack of complete independence etc etc etc...and recently he had to fill out a lengthy questionnaire at his psychiatrists office and it took him a long time to fill it out he took great pains to do it completely and my son is exceptionally honest even if what he believes is true is not the reality I see he stands by his truths.
I didn't want to interfere at all but the next morning while my son was sleeping I stopped in the office and asked to see his questionnaire and the psych nurse commented how positive he scored on it and how tremendously well he must be doing overall. He wrote that he had plenty of friends, he was very satisfied with his social life, he felt well loved and well cared for, he felt safe, content with the amount of activities he does, content with the amount of money he has, satisfied with his goals and accomplishments in life and the answers went on and on like that and very detailed. These answers were my son's truth as he perceives it. Not mine as I see him. I explained to the nurse that these were factually inaccurate to someone like me who lives with him day in and day out. He has no real friends just the neighbor that smokes with him in the evening but that is it. I explained he didn't really do very much in any of these areas --but she said to me this is how he sees it and he seems happy and content, it is not a "problem" that really needs to be "fixed" in his situation. I had to agree with her on that. She and my own therapist have said, that I need to focus on my life now, what I want to do, things I want to accomplish and my son knows I love him and will always be in his corner but physically I am free to do what I need to do within reason. I am not sure I'd leave for 2 weeks or anything (yet) but a couple of days at a time I think is do-able. Life is good again, for now. I absolutely believe that things can get better, given enough time, effective meds and a lot of patience and resilience. My best to you and your son.