It’s amazing sometimes how much there is to learn or be aware of. I have been seeing this term lately and I had no idea what it meant so just looked it up.
If I had had the slightest bit of knowledge on schizophrenia… Well those are things I try not to dwell on. Now that I know, the warning signs were there but I had heard such bad things about Ritalin and didn’t want my son’s ADHD and OCD symptoms medicated. I guess I have to have faith that we were meant to take the journey we are now on.
I believe my son began showing symptoms right around puberty age 11. I also put him on Ritalin for ADH. Been in and out of numerous rehabs, outward bound type. Teachers stated he like to stand up in class and tell wild stories about himself that could not possibly be true. I think you are right there does not seem to be anything I could do to stop it. I believe also that we were meant to take the journey. I try to look on the positive side of everything. I would rather have him in my world as he is than not at all.
I had some psychotic symptoms all the way from age 11. I had paranoia about the dark and sleeping in my own bed at night as a little kid, and then I sometimes had delusions after age 10. My prodromal phase really hit when I was 18, I was mistaken to have depression, which is very common, there was even a table of symptoms in common with schizophrenia and depression in my abnormal psych textbook. It’s too hard to tell the difference between prodromal schizophrenia and a depressive episode.
I did this exact same thing. I even used to take my cloths off to try and get a laugh. I did the strangest out of control stuff and I never could figure why I did it.
My very first diagnosis was ADHD and then bipolar, I’m sure there was OCD in there. Along with severe hyper activity. I was hyper hyper.
When I was 10 and 11 I was a goner. I had the delusions and the voices and the works. I was sure the voice was my kid sister talking to me from my Mom’s belly.
The embarrassing part… I was sure she told me her name long before my parents even knew she was a girl. I kept calling the growing tummy bump Riley. It stuck, my sister’s name is Riley. But it turns out… that was the neighbors Dog’s name.
I have spent some time pondering on this question. It doesn’t look like there is something my mother or I can do at an earlier stage in life so that this illness would not happen to me. It looks like this is my fate. Many things suggested to me this illness is biological, evolving from the bodily system I am born with. It is not only the genetics, but the hardship and stress that my mom or my father has go through that determined my biological make up. I think we don’t have control over having this or not.
Another important question jumps in - with my brain disorder, do I still have control over something in my life? I really want to better carry my roles. I know i am deficient in performing in many aspects. How can I become a better person within my ability? Many people told me I’m clever. I want to know how to put my abilities into use. I want to do something for my mom.
I think you can still have control over certain things. Somethings may be beyond your control but perhaps how you react or cope can be adjusted. Try not to look at it as a deficient just different. No one would expect an office worker to be good at engineering. We all have our own skills or abilities. I think you are a great person. Be the best person that you can be and hopefully your mom will see that. My son made me a tea one day and that still makes me smile.
I want to add, so far I have not see anything claiming to be able to prevent schizophrenia from developing in an individual with its propensity. Did u? Not any medication, I believe. Otherwise we’ll have seen sth like offspring of people with sz are prescribed certain medication before their onset. I don’t see why you doubt your decision in not having your child put on Ritalin. Some thoughts.
No I have not seen anything that would support preventing schizophrenia from developing when predisposed to it. As a parent there will always be the question of what if… Maybe if I had been more aware and stable myself and had taken more steps to treat symptoms of ADHD and OCD then the ensuing psychosis would not have been so bad. If he had had more support and stability then maybe he wouldn’t have turned to marijuana. I do realize I can’t change any of that now. Sometimes the doubts happen anyways even though I try to guard against them.
I have been trying to fight the “What if” game for ages. Sometimes I win, sometimes I’m curled in a ball crying in the bathtub yelling… “why… Why?”
That “what if” game is a killer to play. But for some reason we keep opening that box. It’s like Jumanji, you have to be ready for what that game will throw at you. I try to avoid it, but out of the blue I find myself in the game. The sad thing is, so far, it has taught me nothing.
I do get a bit tired of all the news articles… NO it’s genetic, no it’s pot, NO it’s if your Mom touched cat poo while pregnant… I completely understand were fighting for a better life for future generations.
But sometimes I am selfish and I just want to yell… “stop sending me stories about Cat poo onset. It’s not helping me right now…”
So true. I understand wanting to find out the cause but drawing parallels between anything and everything and it seems like just that. If mom had a fever, if, if, if… I always ask myself what about the situations where all these conditions existed yet mental illness did not develop? I don’t read the news articles too much anymore. It’s the same things being rehashed with one article contradicting the other. I did change the litter box as dad wouldn’t
If I’m honest it makes me a bit nervous sometimes when there are articles about "Completely stamping out all mental illness out of all society.
Is that really going to benefit mankind? Then everyone would be the same always. My hero Sir Richard Branson had a huge learning disability and some ADD and on and on. He’s Sir Richard Branson…
Somehow I have a lot to tell u. I hope u don’t mind if I keep on writing. My mom is happier in these past weeks. Living in the realm of abnormality is something new to both of us. We both had a hard time to adjust. I know she bears a lot of emotional strain. In the past, my parents somehow suggested to me i am their best child. It must be really hard for her to go thru all these with me. I want to say, mom is my best support. She is the only one who comes up with the idea that I have mental illness. She is the one who makes it happens that I receive medical intervention. She and my father are the only ones who let me live with them. She told me only to do my job on a part time basis. She says if I feel happy doing it, then do it. I can tell these are something only someone who feel for u and think for u could suggest to u. She is still saying today, do it on a part time basis only. She comes up with this suggestion on her own.
I wish I could do more things for my parents. I used to have a talent. I can pick them clothes that they look really great in it. This they cannot find from anywhere else. They just love every piece of the clothes I choose for them. My father is still wearing the coat I gave him everyday. It still looks very nice. Mom wears the twin sets that I gave her in important dates. The other talent of me is telling jokes to ease their tension and make them laugh. I am able to do that again recently.
I am so happy to see you doing to well lately. You seem so much happier now. I’m glad things are starting to look up for you. I bet your going to be doing better and better.
Thank you as always for your kinds words and good advice.
Hi james, I think I’m getting thru a big challenge in the past two months. Thank you for being here with me. I am thankful to have someone like u. I can’t say I’m doing very good but there are certainly tiny improvements. I am solving bit by bit of my problems gradually. I get to understand that cashier is not an easy job. I might try something else if I got fired.
I asked my mom this morning do I look as drowsy as I used to be. She said better. Maybe the physical demands of the job is helping. I want to make myself do a little more on a daily basis. Also, I’m eating better. I begin to cook myself a bowl of rice after work. I bought myself raw salmon with staff discount in the shop.
I read from the other post that your little sis is cutting down her course load and work hours. I am so happy to learn about that. I really wish she could cut down on the source of stress and get more rest. Great to learn that this is happening!
Thank you for that… She’s my best friend. I am so happy she’s going to get better. It’s an eye opener for her. Her life is going to change again. Less work, less fake friends, less stress and time to really get where she wants to go. It will be different for both of us.
I’m glad that things are going good with you and your parents. All any parent can ask is that their child be the best that they can be and that doesn’t mean graduating top of the class or getting a big paying job. We all have things that make us unique. Laughter is a great quality. You are trying and I’m sure your parents love you for that. Your mom is right. If you are happy doing it then that is what matters.
I hope u don’t mind if I keep on writing. My mom is happier in these past weeks. Living in the realm of abnormality is something new to both of us. We both had a hard time to adjust. I know she bears a lot of emotional strain. In the past, my parents somehow suggested to me i am their best child. It must be really hard for her to go thru all these with me. I want to say, mom is my best support. She is the only one who comes up with the idea that I have mental illness. She is the one who makes it happens that I receive medical intervention. She and my father are the only ones who let me live with them. She told me only to do my job on a part time basis. She says if I feel happy doing it, then do it. I can tell these are something only someone who feel for u and think for u could suggest to u. She is still saying today, do it on a part time basis only. She comes up with this suggestion on her own.