Great indoor truck: purchase battery and charger too…
I was just struggling with the same problem that you wrote about, Linda.
If nothing else, it is a comfort to hear others who have the same problems with delusions, lawyers being contacted etc.
I keep hearing that the anti-psychotic meds are poisoning him…
Yet his behavior is more stable than it’s been for 20 years!
He leases a really nice apartment in a very quite neighborhood.
It is part of a very small group home which he constantly complains about.
He has immense freedom in every way. there are staff there 24/7 but he doesn’t have to sign out or deal with them except at med time. He CONSTANTLY complains that he is forced to take anti-psychotic meds.
He’s gotten a lawyer to release him from the court-ordered med administration at the end of the year.
I’m praying they don’t turn him out on the street.
Because of homicidal ideation in the past, I can’t have him come to my home any more.
Which breaks my heart.
Merci beaucoup for letting me vent.
The support here is appreciated!
from Vermont,
Maple Woman
I feel your pain and i hope and pray your son stays well and stable . keep us posted and vent as much as you need , we are all here for each other as no one will understand better than all on this site as we live it every day , wish you well .
I’ve had to do the same with my sz husband. But our marriage is really nothing now. I too said no to the private investigator and he went ballistic about that. Now our conversations are very short and high level- weather, sports, etc. he is crazy about politics so I don’t talk about anything political or religion with him to avoid him bringing out a comment with delusions. How has your marriage changed?
This sounds all too familiar and it never stopped. It didn’t matter that the case studies they referred to had nothing to do with them. It didn’t matter how many doctors tried to make them understand that what they were say was inaccurate or a delusion. It didn’t matter that lawyers wouldn’t even take the case. It was always some big conspiracy that everyone was out to get them.
Exactly ! I learn to change or avoid the subject the best i can .
I can appreciate your fear for what could happen. I think if this was my situation, I would try to use LEAP and start by letting him tell me all the concerns he has and giving that great respect I would tell him it is important to me to understand how he feels. Then I would ask him what IS good about his current situation…it would be “Pros & Cons” list. You might have to help him with this and it might take multiple sessions. In Dr. Amador’s book, a person might never acknowledge that they are sick and need A/P meds, but they MIGHT take meds for other reasons…it gets him a good apartment, freedom, etc. If nothing else, get him to trust you (using LEAP), while still drawing boundaries to protect you and that ultimately are intended to help him continue being stable. You are cared about!!
I know what you mean. Our relationship has changed. But my focus now, honestly, is to get through another day without incident (but without caving or lying) it’s not easy. Some days his insight is better than others, and those days we have real conversations. Other days, I have to shut down conversations that I know will make us both angry, in a calm way, by finding a distraction or diversion. It’s not the same marriage but things change… We are making the best of it.
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My son goes thru the same things about food. He studies labels, and make sudden decisions about what he “can and can’t” eat. He sometimes bemoans his weight, but then eats high calorie foods.
My son one day says he can not eat meat at all then the next day he will … do you know why they behave like this ? Do you think voices are telling them that ? I’m so confused . I do see him smile and giggle for no reason from time to time .
I understand completely because I walk in your shoes. I am lucky because I do have support from my husband who is my son’s father and two of my adult children. I have 3 children and the oldest who is 41 and the youngest who is 25 both have Schizoaffective /bipolar type. The oldest is doing great but it took many years for his mind to settle down. The youngest still has a very hard time and he does take his medicine. I know in time my younger son’s mind will calm down too. Two of the best things I did this past year were: my youngest now lives in his own apartment which is part of a group home. Social services pays for it and gives him food stamps and a little money each month. We still see him almost everyday. Three days a week he goes to meeting at a mental health recovery place; secondly I read the book by Dr. Amador, “I’m Not Sick, I Don’t Need Help”. What our children have is inherited a bad gene. Both my son’s have it, my father did and my brother. )<: For some reason the insane gene only is in the boys in my family. Fondly, Robin
I like your advice. LEAP!
Love your advice Catherine.
I expect delusions, or voices, and/or confusion due to the illness.
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Merci beaucoup, your reply was very supportive and useful.
Will work the LEAP concepts.
Maple Woman
See if he qualifies for social security disability.