Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

Can Someone please explain delusions


#1

Hi

Things have gone from bad to worse with my son. I am really fed up with the situation. He has this delusion that I have Munchsauens by proxy. He thinks I caused his illness and that he was in the hospital all the time when he was a kid. He was never in the hospital at all. This is completely untrue. I was a very loving mother. I did all I could for him.

He blames everything on me. Everything. He sends scathing texts and tells me to burn in hell. He is homeless lives in a tent with his friend. He has a part time job he could afford a place to live at this point, Other people like him. But he hates me. To his mind I am the root of all evil. He has accused me of every heinous thing imaginable. Interestingly he never outright threatens me because he says he doesn’t want to be Baker acted or arrested. He drinks and says he will never take meds again. he says he is happy the way he is. It’s me who needs help.

Frankly I am afraid of him. How can he believe such untrue things. It’s so sad that he turned out this way it is everything I have feared. Is there any hope that he can tun this around? At this point I can;t have anything to do with him.

I am so happy for all of you who are doing well thanks for helping me. This forum is a real lifeline. I appreciate all of you so much!


#2

When I first got sick I blamed it on my parents and my sisters. It took me a few months until it donned on me that they were NOT the cause of my illness and they were actually on my side. I did what your son did and I thought that I didn’t have a problem, but that it was everybody else that had the problem. Sometimes you just can’t argue with a delusional mind.


#3

Delusions are your truth. My delusion made me believe I was communicating through radio waves. Like a radio. And I knew I could walk on water.

You can’t talk anyone out of delusions. Meds are needed for that.

I’m sorry for your son but maybe he needs to crasch hard and end up in hospital to get help. I did that. I was delusional for a year before I got hospitalized. It got worse and worse until I did not function anymore. I didn’t eat or sleep. My husband had to feed me. I got passive because it was all so overwhelming. Apathy hit me like a hard rock and I became catatonic.


#4

Dear Tea42,

Delusions are more believable than regular thoughts; I had them once as a horrible reaction to medication. For me it was almost like a feeling of internal revelation, like I finally understood what my life was about and why things were the way they were.

Neutral news about delusions is that people can believe two contradictory things at once, so maybe he has other beliefs as well that aren’t so harsh.

I think you might try to call any local, state-funded mental illness crisis team and fill them in on the situation. Also, if there are social workers who go around to reach out to people who live in tents, tell them about his situation; show them his picture. Let anyone who might be a potential helper and who might encounter your son know that he has family and people who want him to get better. Explain to them the reasons you cannot help him or be in contact with him.

What happens is out of your hands. There is a likelihood that he could receive help and recover.


#5

A delusion is basically a set or system of beliefs that a particular individual has that is not based upon real-world evidence.

For all intents & purposes, nearly everyone has a delusion - whether religious or non-religious, theistic or atheistic. Everyone clings to something that is either empirically unverifiable or utter speculation.

I started to be heavily angered by my Mother & Father(s) for the way they treated me as a child when they were in their worst moods. It’s almost impossible to forgive, but I strongly believe SZ is caused by something more sinister than mere abuse - but perhaps I could be wrong, for oftentimes victims of abuse have normalized their situation in spite of the harm done to them.

It’s common for sons to blame mothers for all sorts of travesties. I am often heavily inclined, on a bad day. to blame my mother’s use of pain-killers, smoking, and circumcizing me as a scapegoat for my SZ. It’s hard to find any other scapegoat, because in my situation it was not self-imposed. I was drug-free & very spot on about health & humanism.


#6

You are not alone! My son does the same thing.
Right now, I think my son is just telling us to back off-which I am doing, but its hard!!!!! I think as mothers, we keep trying to fix things for our kids-even when they are grown. Go for your gut instinct and just stand back for awhile. Its awful to know, and its awful not knowing, but there really isnt much you can do right now. I do hope you can get a social worker to check in on him. My son seems to listen to a 3rd party more…
Hang tough! OO


#7

I just feel so bad about this. My neighbor said she saw him outside of Walmart and he just ranted about the government. She said he looked terrible. I just want to put a stop to this! Homelessness, drinking and being off meds. I am afraid he is going to die.

I wish I could bring him home but I know that would be a nightmare. We gave him every chance. I keep going over and over in my mind how did it come to this?
This is exactly what I was dreading when the diagnosis came down that my son had schizo-effective. He probably would like to live at home drink, and be off his meds do whatever he wants. But I have other kids, and grandkids.

I wish I could have him committed like in the old days so he would be safe and clean. I have offered to take him to the hospital but he gets really mad. He could get housing and job training but he won’t.

Sorry for ranting If you would have talked to me 2 years ago I would have told you how great he was doing. he’s always been the type of person that hates rules though. I just really want him to get better before the holidays but I think thats unrealistic at this point. The rest of the family is fed up with him and he has turned into a really cruel person even to my parents because they refused to let him stay at their house.

I will see if I can get a social worker to make a contact with him. The police around here know him and have taken him to psych 4 times in the last 4 months I just wish he would stay in and get better. I would support him 100 percent.


#8
  1. Get a copy of this book and read it. Have your family read it, too.
    http://www.amazon.com/Surviving-Schizophrenia-6th-Edition-Family/dp/0062268856

  2. If she/he needs a professional intervention, tell me where you live, and I will get back to you with leads to those services.

  3. Get properly diagnosed by a board-certified psychopharmacologist who specializes in the psychotic disorders. One can find them at…
    https://psychiatrists.psychologytoday.com/rms/

  4. Work with that p-doc to develop a medication formula that stabilizes your symptoms sufficiently so that you can tackle the psychotherapy that will disentangle your thinking. The best of the therapies for that currently include…
    DBT – http://behavioraltech.org/resources/whatisdbt.cfm
    MBSR – http://www.mindfullivingprograms.com/whatMBSR.php
    ACT – https://contextualscience.org/act
    10 StEP – http://pairadocks.blogspot.com/2015/04/the-10-steps-of-emotion-processing.html

  5. the even newer somatic psychotherapies like…
    MBBT – https://www.newharbinger.com/blog/introduction-mind-body-bridging-i-system
    SEPT – https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Somatic_Experiencing
    SMPT – https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sensorimotor_psychotherapy

  6. or standard CBTs, like…
    REBT – https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rational_emotive_behavior_therapy
    Schematherapy – https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schema_Therapy
    Learned Optimism – https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Learned_optimism
    Standard CBT – http://www.beckinstitute.org/what-is-cognitive-behavioral-therapy/About-CBT/252/


#9

Im going to get it at Barnes and noble thanks. I hope it will give me some insight.


#10

**Just like my son.
Too-all the police know who my son is.
I wish I had answers for you. Call officers that have CIT training also-they can at least check on him. Maybe they will decide to take him in if they think he is a danger to himself, or others.
Its hard when the rest of the family is not feeling it like you. I wish my 2 girls would have stuck it out with me. It is hard on everyone. Im so sorry-I know how you feel. Take a break for yourself, and don`t lose hope. :pray: **


#11

In response to your other questions I live in play South Florida. He has a great doctor but refuses to see him right now. He was stable for about 6 years but went off meds. He was well stabilized on medication so I know it can work. The thing is; we can get him into the hospital but as soon as he gets a little better he checks himself right out. I have begged them to hold him longer but they say they can not hold him against his will for more than 72 hours on a baker or 5 days on a marchman.

But I will get the book and make some more calls. I was hoping the situation would work itself out and that he would get into a group home and some supported employment which is what the sw was recommending. At this point something has to be done he’s been out there on and off for months. he does have friends that he stays with here and there. and a network of people. But I can’t take this anymore it’s tearing me and the rest of my family apart worrying about him.

Thanks so much I will follow your advice as best as I am able.


#12

Luckily the police around here are really nice. I took the Nami class and I learned about cit, which thankfully we do have in our area. He has been taken in numerous times. Unfortunately I feel that at this point he is danger to me in particular because of his delusions. My husband told him that he would be there for him when he is ready to get help but to leave me out of it. He has been very hateful and verbally abusive to me so everyone is worried for my safety,
I hope he gets better I know it is possible. I think he just doesn’t like being forced into things. I can not say I blame him on that one. I know when he comes around he will be better knowing it is what he wants.


#13

@SurprisedJ I’m sorry for bringing up horrible memories (and I’m sure I will definitely be doing it by asking this) but what do you think? I know you said you were homeless for a while.

Here are a few more links for you.

Please look at these sites:
http://www.leapinstitute.org/5 - under resources are free videos on using LEAP
LEAP is a way of communicating to build trust. Listen-Empathize-Agree-Partner.
http://dramador.com/1 - Dr. Xavier Amador is a clinical psychologist whose brother had schizophrenia. He is the founder of the LEAP Institute. Wrote the book: I’m Not Sick I Don’t Need Help! Can buy from his website.
Search Xavier Amador and LEAP on youtube.com and you should find some long videos
http://www.treatmentadvocacycenter.org/index.php - under problems you will see anosognosia
Anosognosia looks like denial but is different.
http://lesswrong.com/lw/e25/bayes_for_schizophrenics_reasoning_in_delusional/1 - helped my understand delusions
http://www.nami.org/ - National Alliance on Mental Illness.
http://www.schizophrenia.ca/ - Schizophrenia Society of Canada
Can also find some very useful information here:
http://schizophrenia.com/

(from BarbieBF)


#14

A lot of part time psychotics do not act right towards a stranger…It’s called thought broadcasting to stalk someone specific and harass him/her about something private. Mental care refuses to discuss these social problems and calls it delusional. There are lots of topics you can look up online with millions of hits if you look for right word, but it is policy of mental care to call this delusional as they are not allowed to discuss it. Sadly, this does bring harm to news schizo but it is policy of mental care and no one is very motivated to change this. If you ever get angry with mental care, you will be locked up in mental hospital, arrested in front of everyone, at forced into mental hospital at your own expense for as long as the psych doctor can justify.

Targeted individual is what some who think schizo is technology based call themselves.

Thought insertion - means your internal voice is hijacked and you keep hearing a word or phrase repeated not related to current train of thought, environment or actions. This is most common in children and old people around schizos as bad joke these sound possessed. Sadly bring lots of harm to young children of someone confused. But, kid has no clue he/she is saying something upsetting, just ignore this.

Guided conversations - Groups of part-time psychotics, usually from big anti-christ unfit/no ethics churches, get together to go to restaurant and sit there talking crazy talk aloud from voices in their head to bother someone at next table. Preach stalking, some churches send theirs out stalking some on disability pay following mental care as unethical…some of these are so confused from their pastor’s hatred of mental illness label (because pastor is nuts too), they will allow harm to happen to their own mentally ill child who will not go over to church to possibly make voices stop because you are following orders from dirty business man who runs some of these churches. Ethics has nothing to do with these churches. Usually is pentacostal or mega-churches. These churches will mistreat people who went there to make voices stop, especially sex victims, wallet is checked and person is thrown back out onto street with more stalkers/harassers, possibly left unable to work.

V2K - Name for the mental abuse technology behind schizo, originally designed to communicate in untraceable manner with spies.

Memory loss forms like temporary amnesia on one subject or PTSD (trauma or no physical trauma) – You spent too much time around wrong people, especially if you lived alone or attended college. Mental care won’t assist with this at all nor treat it, memories are going to play back over 10 years even in taunting fashion sometimes. I WOULD NEVER RETURN TO GROUP OF PEOPLE WHO CAUSE THIS TO HAPPEN AS SOME SUFFERED SEX ASSAULT, DISCREDITED BY MENTAL CARE AND NOT ALLOWED TO PRESS CHARGES, FOLLOWED ALL OVER TOWN AND TAUNTED. This is called ‘false memories’. If you run into mental care using this term, you need to find new care as it gets people hurt.

Tactile, olfactory, visual, auditory hallucinations – most know about last two, first two mean sensations without cause and smells without cause.

Frequently a new schizo suffers some trespassing and stolen or broken belongings, this does cause some to turn to living minimalist or outdoors. I would highly recommend you talk your boy into living with a relative in another part of the country and see how it goes…Kid needs to know some people will even step outside and shoot off guns in country because they are crazy, rest will be more tame. He can ignore anyone talking crazy to him if he wants, this is preferred way to handle it. Someone may give him a job after a while…I really think a relative who knows the local thugs would be best option as most people who move after a nervous break run into something wrong/someone hurting people anywhere they move, including small towns. If your relatives knows all the locals, he can protect your son from being surprised…maybe someone will give him a job and he can feel okay enough to live in apartment. My area has long history of breaking belongings of locals, some own nothing but a bed and clothing for years if they have any problems. You can do almost anything on a cell phone or use library if you want more computer…Things will pass and he can take steps to live more normal life eventually. He may like one of those little houses some are building themselves on wheels, this is way some who had problems with trespassers deal with it and only own minimal stuff…

I would not discuss kid’s diagnosis is you can help it locally. He will get through this easier if he is sociable as the other consumers will help him understand things where the mental care won’t help. He doesn’t have to follow orders from voices if he feels it unethical, just ignore it all and it will pass.

Hope it helps.You may be able to talk your boy into taking seroquel at night cut into pieces, it will give him a nice sleep and improve functioning. It will keep him meds compliant so the disability checks continue too…Has few side effects.

If your boy got in an argument with someone before the voices started, he should not talk to them again and avoid them for best outcome.


#15

Three years ago, I was homeless, and I blamed my mother entirely. Granted, she actually did do some pretty bad things, and at the time I thought they were unforgivable. I chose to be homeless rather than live with her. Homelessness brings about a kind of freedom you just can’t get anywhere else. Nobody expects you to be anywhere, and you can do whatever you want for as long as you please. The downside is that it also comes with the soul-crushing knowledge that you aren’t wanted anywhere. But I could just drink until I forgot that, and nobody would be there to make me stop, so I just kind of drifted on in that state for a while. Since I live up north, I ended up getting a cheap apartment for the winter months, but your son probably won’t have that barrier. That is good, because it means he won’t freeze out there.

The reason I eventually decided to seek treatment was because I had a wake-up call moment. It was my little sister’s wedding, and I remember being there and just feeling absolutely nothing. I should have been overflowing with joy to watch the girl I raised on the happiest day of her life. But I just felt dead inside. That was when I finally realized something was wrong with me, and that I wanted to get better.

I think most of us in recovery have a story similar to that. I think treatment is most effective when the individual chooses treatment on their own. If they are physically aggressive or suicidal, they can be forced into treatment, but it doesn’t sound like that’s the case with your son. Although it has to be heartbreaking to know what he’s going through, the best thing you can probably do is just wait for him to be ready to seek treatment. Sometimes, we just have to walk a hard path in order to see how broken we really are.

One thing that I later found out, that might help. After I first got sick, my doctor was prescribing me antipsychotics, but telling me they were migraine medication because he knew I wasn’t ready to accept that I needed psych meds. None of them worked, and some of them actually made me worse, but if you know a drug he does well on, that might be worth a shot. Get his doctor to say he has high blood pressure or some BS, and give him the pills. Of course, that could also backfire horribly, but it might be a last-ditch effort for you if he is still wiling to see a general physician.


#16

Oh, and I forgot to add: after getting on the right meds, I was able to get my feelings of empathy back, and I eventually forgave my mother for everything. We have a very good relationship now. Although, I am more forgiving than the average bear, so this might be atypical.


#17

Thanks so much all of you for helping me.

I am really sad that my son is out there. I want to help him but not sure what to do. He was stable for 6 years on Serequil xr. He also had a lot of treatment inpatient and out patient. The thing with my son is he just won’t try. He has always been like this even as a kid. My whole family has spent a ton of energy and resources on him since his diagnosis in 07. When we add it all up he has received twice as much financial support than all of his 4 other siblings and cousins combined. Stuff like inpatient treatment, drug rehab, half way houses, rent, food, job training, transportation, most of this all out of pocket for us and his grandparents. We are still suffering financially to this day. At this point no one in the family wants to be around him because he is so mean. The last time he was around his sister’s friends were here he insulted every one of them and even made one girl cry. His brother was ready to fight him. What a disaster! I refuse to live with someone who is behaving this way and just wants to use my home as a stop off so that he can get stuff and then do what ever he wants.

Cj when you say the crushing knowledge that no one wants to be around you- I feel so bad because that is what my son must be dealing with. Even though he says he hates all of us and is happy the way he is.He has been told that when he want to get better we will help him. But right now he is out right refusing treatment and will not get sober. His friends are all never do well types. So even if I could afford to put him up somewhere (which I can not) he would just move all of these people in with him. Plus he gets SI and SSI and could live somewhere is he wanted to.

The hard thing is that he is in my city, My friends call me up to tell me they saw him here or there and how bad he looks. This always makes me cry. He is my son I love him. When I tell you we all went all out to help him I really mean it, Not just me and his dad but extended family, friends, church family, Nami friends.

I understand there is not much I can do right now besides pray. But the sad thing is I am the closest one to him. I spent the most energy trying to help him. Yes sometimes I was pushing him to get jobs etc. But now he hates me most of all. I would never have thought my son would hurt me but now I am pretty sure he would. He really believes that I did all these bad thing when he was a kid. He aid I hurt him that’s why he was always in the hospital as a child. Honestly he was never in the hospital until his first psych admission he was BA’d not by me he was 19 at the time. I guess this is part of the illness but it scares me he goes around telling everyone this. probably some people believe it.

I am really tired of this. Thank all of you so much for giving me some hope. and I am really happy for all of you who are doing so well. It really takes an unbelievably great and strong spirit to recover from this illness. You all are my inspiration! taking the time out to read and help someone like me means a lot. It really helps me to hear all of you comments and have some one to talk to,


#18

Dear Tea42,

It seems you have done everything you can; I know you would move mountains. I know you would move heaven and earth to help your child, but it’s not up to you right now, for now.

Since he is so angry and acting so destructively, maybe it’s kindest now, especially to him, to give him space and let go.


#19

You shouldn’t have to put up with this. Do what you can for your son, but don’t take abuse. Let him know that you can’t do certain things for him because of the way he’s acting. Let him know that he is hurting you. You really can’t do much of anything for him when he is so delusional.


#20

He is very far in. When a person can admit themselves that this or that; thoughts they entertain may be delusional, they are accepting they do indeed have a difficulty to ‘own up to’. Until then I can say from personal experience that the reality factor is not to be given up graciously…no one can tell you your so called delusions are indeed delusions. Make sense?