Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

When I pass who will take my place


#1

I am having a real hard time worrying who will be their for my daughter when I pass.No one seems to care and this worry never leaves me.I was wondering how families cope dealing with this fear every day


#2

How bad are your daughter’s symptoms? I am concerned that my son may be isolated after my death but he is recovering quite well with a lot of encouragement, support and meds. I still think he can get married and have a family as he no longer ‘presents’ as mentally ill. He just shows some lack of motivation but he’s not too bad. Have you ever talked to your daughter about recovery? From the beginning I told my son he can recover and have a good life and it’s working - slowly, but it’s working. I have two other friends, one with BPD and one with SZA disorder. They are both women, both med compliant, both married with children, stable and working. Of course, they each know about the others, which tends to reinforce their respective recoveries so it gives them hope.


#3

Yes, I think at some point this is something we all worry about. One way to relieve that worry is to put everything you can in place now. So, in your will you state that the executors have to follow a list of actions to make sure your daughter will be cared for. You’ll need to put this list together with your daughter. For example, if you help your daughter with chores, then your list could include hiring a cleaner.


#4

We worry every single day.

Just went to a new bank this last weekend, and began making arrangements for “in the event of my husbands death”.

Dear me…
NOT what I wanted to discuss on our Valentine Day weekend.

But, I did feel better afterwards. I was smiling and the tightness in my chest has lessened.
We have more of a plan now, one that actually incorporates our son.

Whew…
Facebook feed had this question pop up last week. Many others expressed the same worry. One poster, is looking to arrange some sort of support group in this regard.

I’ve also seen a few seminars offered on this subject.

It’s a genuine concern.
Our older boy (15) already talks about his worry over what career will allow him to continue to care for his brother?

When this subject comes up with our younger son (and it does), he becomes suicidal FAST.
It’s our “elephant in the room” subject.


#5

Having guardianship, part of the process is identifying someone to be his guardian when I can no longer do it. Currently a childhood friend, who just became a doctor, is named.


#6

you can do a Trust Fund and Name a list of couple close friends or relatives on the Trust.
Suppose your Net Worth is 500K; an example. Hire a lawyer to write a Trust for you ( will cost about $700 to $1000) and specify in the Trust who will be handling the care for your daughter and allocating the expenses while she is living after you pass away.
Talk to the appointed friends and relatives and explain your concern and how much you trust them to care for your child.


#7

Yes, it’s the same if you’re in the UK. There are different types of trust, depending on how you want the assets and any earnings to be managed. Have a look at https://www.investopedia.com/articles/personal-finance/062315/how-set-trust-fund-uk.asp


#8

Oh yes, we also have this elephant :elephant: