This is a serious struggle.
I hope this makes sense. It’s been a long hard morning already!
It’s been 4 years since my son was diagnosed Bipolar Schizoaffective.
He was medicated for 2ish of these 4 years and did very well on Abilify. He got accepted into one of the best creative colleges, moved to campus and immediately quit taking meds.
My son currently lives with my long term boyfriend and I. Unfortunately, he is self isolated in the basement. Not going to college, not working, no driver license. Plays video games, watches movies, sleeps all day and up all night. This is not the life I dreamed my only child would have.
We just moved into this house 4 months ago. The monsters at the end of the driveway moved with us too. My son has every positive and negative symptom.
I believe that the louder the voices are, the louder my son is and if there are voices while I am presently speaking, my son will yell over me and not allow himself to hear me or the voices.
The meaner my son gets, the harder it is for me to be patient and empathetic with the blunt force of his anger.
His biggest delusions are that him and I have never liked each other along with all the “excuses” about why he can’t do something (pretty much anything and everything). There is no reasoning with him or having a half normal conversation. Unless he is medicated.
My son will not voluntarily admit himself. I have called 911 immediately after he admitted to hurting himself (because of me of course) and provided a recording of his confession. But the self destruction was a week prior to the confession so apparently there was nothing the police could do. Even-though he just stood there screaming at me with distorted thoughts and I had to just sit there and take the beating. I never raised my voice once.
Since my son is so against me and previous experience with the police has not proven helpful, it seems that if I call 911 again that it will escalate current issues and likely create new ones. He is paranoid already.
Currently, we are not buying him any “special” food and he has access to only healthy items. His retaliation is to hoard all of my silverware. I will be buying new silverware so the family coming over on Christmas will have something to eat the feast with. This is the second set of silverware I have bought in 4 months.
It’s recommended to not add stress on them. But what about me? The giver, the supporter, the one that tries to lift spirits and encourage people. The one who is strong. What happens when that person is depleted? Because I can’t take the mental beating anymore. My mental health is steadily deteriorating from all the trauma.
My son’s behavior is abnormal. It seems the only solution is medication.
Has anyone tried anything out of the norm and had success?
How do you fix behavioral issues with this illness? Or is it only done with meds?
Where do you draw the line when they are noncompliant? Refusing treatment, will not take meds, and blames you for not helping them but does absolutely nothing to help you help them?
The answers are limited and likely obvious. Maybe I just needed to write and get this out.
Thank you for taking the time to read this. I appreciate you!