Hello I’m new here, I’m glad I found this forum. my boyfriend is currently hospitalized due to an episode he had on Saturday, although he was experiencing psychotic behavior for many years he actually was never diagnosed. I’m not sure what brought this on but he has been going through a lot of stress and has been doing a lot of cocaine in the past couple months. His mom had schizophrenia and I see a lot of the same things in him. He’s currently in the hospital believing he is Jesus Christ, he refuses to be called by his name. He feels like me and his family are the devil. He’s been very violent with the staff at the hospital and he won’t stop talking about Jesus Christ. I’m really scared that he will never come out of this. They are trying him on different meds to stabilize him, but this is his first full blown psychosis. I’m basically just wondering what to expect, and what everyone’s expierence was like the first time? Thank you so much for any advice you can give.
Any children together?
Just this fact is enough for me to say walk/run away and don’t look back… schizophrenia or not Why are you involved with a full blown drug addict unless you are one too?
We have no children together but have been in a relationship for 18 months. I’m definitely not a drug addict and seeing him deteriorate in the past 6 months has been hard. I love him very much and feel like I could “help” him I guess. I remember when he was great, I miss the old him. I miss the way he was before he started this behavior. I want to believe with the right medications he can be ok again and live a normal happy life.
Others on this forum will provide different advise, but in my opinion, it will never be a normal happy life… walk…
From what I’m reading on here I see that. I’m so incredibly sad. I just want him back. I wish he would have been treated earlier than the age he is now (30). They always believed his pyschotic behavior was from drug use.
Some people do recover and get better and can live a good life. There is no real way of knowing if he will be one of the lucky individuals who responds well to medication and will actually take it. It sounds as if he is in a very bad state at this time. The substance abuse compounds the problem significantly😪 Some people will be completely disabled from this illness. I certainly hope your boyfriend recovers well.
I don’t mean to be a downer, but my experience has been very negative regarding recovery and happiness to the point I had to separate from my husband. If you read this forum, you will notice most people on here are in dire straights with their son, daughter, wife or husband. None of this to me is happy. I always had a glimmer of hope when he came out of the hospital and he seemed like his old self only to be disappointed a few months later by either non-compliance with meds or the meds no longer working to keep him sane. I hung in there 3.5 years thru a lot of downs and a lot of “trying to help” to no avail. If he has family and you don’t have children together, I would not stay, but that’s me. However, he will come around, they usually do with the right combination of meds. One time, it took my husband 5 months, 3 hospital transfers and many meds to finally come around. Again, sorry for the negativity, but I wish you and him all of the luck in the world. It doesn’t cost you anything but time to wait and see what happens.
We are a self selected group of family members and friends of people suffering from these illnesses. According to statistics, there is a good chance your boyfriend will recover significantly with medication and IF he stops using illicit drugs and possibly alcohol, depending on the severity of his condition.
If he does not stop using illicit substances, he will not recover from mental illness enough to be the kind and caring, supportive boyfriend you deserve.
My advice is to write him a note and let him know you would like to see him if he wishes to see you again. Since he is so ill right now, you have a couple weeks (at least) to write this and get it to him, if he starts to stabilize. If he doesn’t, I would just give space until he accepts medical treatment and chooses sobriety. It doesn’t mean you don’t love him or that he doesn’t love you, just that his illness is debilitating and made worse by his choice to use cocaine.
Best to you.
Thank you so much for all the advice. I will start to write him a letter and take my time doing so. I’m afraid he will just come back out and repeat the cycle of drug use and if that is what happens I am definitely gone. He does have family, it’s just so hard for me to just walk away but I know I may have to do this for my sanity…and my life. He consumes so much of me. I don’t have time for anything else. He’s very controlling and can be abusive. I just don’t know if he will ever be the same again and if he will ever remember who he is, he is still insisting he’s Jesus Christ. They tried him on ambilify this morning and he took depakote last night, his nurse told me that he told them his thoughts are slower today, but he’s still in psychosis. I tried calling to speak with them today and he hung up on me. He is just isolating himself…he hasn’t even used his phone time to call his family. I’m not sure if that is normal or what. This is so stressful just with what I have gone through so far.
Just so u get it as clear as possible no one knows anything other than there are a handful
If drugs that sometimes work for certain people no one know how long it will take or how much better it will get and sadness is the most available feeling u will be exposed to being in love with someone in psycosis is pretty much a oneway street so u will handle it as best u can which u can’t know how well that is and for as long as u can which u will not know until u have reached ur limit and I wish u the best
I get volunteer to have my heart broken everyday so that I don’t feel like I’m giving up on the person I promised to always be there for but having really had a day since since it has begun where I felt like I did the right thing or made any difference at all and believe it isn’t from lack of trying but we have noooooooooo power over this chemical imbalance
And the voices can be so loud and real to them that nothing u say or do will matter because what they hear in they’re head all day is what they believe
And u can’t fix what’s not real since we base our moves off logic and reasoning and they’re are based off mean nasty voices in there heads all day long
I wish u the best pray eat right and exercise u will need ur strength for whatever term u stick around for
Ohh and don’t expect for them to contribute financially anymore that might asking for way too much
There are dual diagnosis treatment centers for substance abuse and mental health. Look for one of those for your boyfriend.
It is good that you are willing to stick with him, to love him, to support him. But to do that you must come to grips with the possible long term outcome he is facing. There are some that do respond and recover well, but I don’t believe they are the majority. It’s not necessarily doom and gloom but it may be severely and permanently a different way of life. That life can be rich, there can be love. And what that looks like for now is to set healthy boundaries, and this can be done even though he is ill. Insist that he get treatment and stay in treatment. If not, the most loving thing you can do is walk away.
My son has recovered very well indeed. That’s why I don’t come here much. So the self-selection here means that you tend to find carers here whose family members have not recovered well so they need more support. You can recover. However, the absolutely worst indicator for recovery is “dual diagnosis” - sz+drug addiction. So your boyfriend is not in a good position right now, it’s true.
Hatty, I’m so glad to hear your son recovered very well. Happy news!
I’m pretty relieved myself! Around diagnosis time it was terrible. I was panicked and crying buckets and for a while he did not take his medication regularly so things were up and down (but most of the time he was not in psychosis). After he was sectioned he decided to stay on his depot shots for two years and he has got better and better. He tried coming off them a few months ago. But then he chose to start again. So we’ve had two pretty good years. I know it can be a relapsing illness but also he is trying to claw back the cognitive skills he lost by reading and studying programming. He is still pretty upset about all the years and opportunities he feels he has ‘wasted’ and he has no confidence about ever finding a partner. So he has not escaped unscathed. Far from it. And we are both a lot poorer than we would have been without this dreadful, wicked disease.
It doesn’t seem like many people escape unscathed. His choice to stop and then start the medication again is amazing. Sounds like he is taking really good care of himself in a way that makes sense to him.