Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

Caregiver at a loss?


#1

Yesterday was a very odd day at the Mackenzie home. My sis is not OCD, but she’s been manically cleaning. She vacuumed all the kitchen cupboards, and has dusted and scrubbed every table we own. She even cleaned the under sides of the tables and chairs. Scrubbed down the inside of the fridge and the entire bathroom. She’s boxed stuff up and donated it, she’s washed every mirror and window, and she washed my car. It’s 40 degrees f out side.

She says with no SZ peer group, not a lot of work hours due to the holidays and (here’s the odd one) the fact that I don’t seem to need her as much as I used to… (???) she said she feels adrift with no compass.

I said… "all this skittering around cleaning to this point is sort of getting to me… Go, get out of the house and see a friend."
She said that none of her friends are in trouble and don’t need her right now.

You know those friends who are ONLY around when times are good and never there for you when it’s all hitting the fan. Well it seems like she doesn’t know how to be there when times are good. Is that even possible? It’s like she really is waiting by the Bat phone. (there’s been lots of batman reference around the house lately)

She said her Ennui has turned into Malaise and she doesn’t want to sink into Languor. So the sad/ manic cleaning continues. I can not put up with another week of manic cleaning. Any ideas on how to snap her out of it?

I’m beginning to think this is why so many hurt and broken people end up in her life, she goes looking for them.


#2

Doing household chore is not bad for a 17 year old. There were great reports saying that, what activities we were doing often at teenage, we would find them calming and satisfying whenever we are doing them again at a later stage in life. Probably when she gets older and meets up some challenge in life, she can do some household chores and find tranquility in it. It is inevitable we need to learn to be alone and happy.

Also, we have reports youngsters who do household chores are better in managing their career. They maintain employment much better.


#3

My SZ is much stronger than my OCD, so I don’t go around the house tiding up and cleaning…but when things gets dirty and messed up in my life there are two options for me one is that I surrender to my depression and crawl into the corner of my bed and do nothing, or I get up and start cleaning and tiding up, I release that bad energy inside me, a sort of letting go the bad vibes, I feel that I can tidy the outside if I couldn’t control the other aspects of my life, putting things in order if things seemed too messy in my life…it works and I find my self feeling much better at the end…It’s a way of re-putting things in order, that’s what I think.


#4

Your sister sounds very mature for 17. I don’t understand compulsive cleaning because frankly I’ve never felt that urge to do it. But just be there for your sister. i know you are already. Good luck! :slight_smile:


#5

I’d love to have her here!
Might be good for her to join a group that needs helpers.
Soup kitchens, Salvation Army, Pet Rescue, etc.
She could socialize and use her energy in a way that will help her self esteem.


#6

you just have a beautiful sister who loves helping you and other people, if the world was filled with loving souls like your sister the world would shine from the furthest star.
take care