Hi!
Its funny, somehow voicing a cheerful hello seems out of place here—but I am truly excited to connect with others who grew up with a parent with sz. I am excited because I am 30 and I have never talked about this with anyone before— and I finally feel strong enough to stop pretending everything is okay and explore the trauma of my childhood…and allow myself to grieve the loss…and hopefully find the humor in it as well…like that time I woke up and my mom had dyed literally every fabric in the house purple!
I want to hear your stories, and share your pain, and I want to talk about what it means for the rest of our lives— and is it okay to have kids? And do you worry if it will happen to you? Etc etc— I wanna know it all!!
So this is a net being cast out to the universe, hoping to reel in some fish from the same hard knock school of life that I attended.
I’m 27 and recently I met a cousin from my Mom’s side. I met him after 10 years. He shared about how he felt he was afraid that he would get the disease in his 20’s. He’s 40 now.
I am not sure on the kids question, I was thinking of asking doctors, genetic counseling.
I don’t exactly have your backstory, but am sharing this thought:
My mom’s side of the family has a strong history of mental illness-major depression, bi polar and sz and Alzheimer dementia. Mom currently has moderate AD. My dad’s side of the family has a strong history of high blood pressure and early cardiac death which took my grandfather, uncle and my dad.
Then there is my husband who lost both parents before he was 25–one to stroke and the other to cancer.
We cannot escape the pain of humanity. Same universe. Different hard knocks. Lots of loss regardless. Humor helps. A lot. And I think Purple is a nice color. You sound like you are a survivor of life --good for you. Because that, not the type of risk, is what will get you through the chaos of life.
Hey!! it’s been a while since i’ve been on here! i’m currently still living at home and my mom was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia and this has really affected me not gonna lie! i worry a lot about me developing it also, we believe it was self induced considering she was addicted to some pretty heavy drugs for a while but it still terrifies me everyday! sometimes i think i hear something and i freak out because i don’t want to end up like my mom! i’m 18 currently but it all started when i was in my freshman year of highschool so i always felt i had to keep it a secret in order to protect my mom so i never had friends over i never even talked about my mom! i recently have been realizing how my other relationships in my life have actually been a result of my mom, let me explain! so i am a avid church goer and i had some youth leaders that are women and i found myself hanging out with them more than the youth! i figured out this is a result of not having a mom figure in my life so i’m trying to fill that void! anyway that’s been a positive out of all of this although there has been a lot of negatives as well, i get really bad anxiety attacks because i stress out about it too much, at one time my mom tried to commit suicide in front of me and i had to stop her i constantly think about this when i’m around where it happened or just around my mom in general! so that’s been a rough thing i’ve been faced with currently! anyway its glad to hear i’m not the only one with a parent who is affected by it! thanks for sharing!
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I have no scientific evidence to back this up but I am pretty sure drug is a tipping point for many. I am not your mom but I am proud of you for finding positives. And would like to think in her haze of mental confusion she would be proud of you too. Continue to reach out to others for help especially with your anxiety. As you are a church goer I will share a scripture that really helps me Phil 4:6-7.
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