My dad has paranoid SZ. He is 65yrs. Had a stroke in October. He attempted suicide in December. Pack a day smoker and history of alcohol and drug abuse.
I remember his pain being so real and so raw. But can he even feel it any more with Thorazine and fluoxetine? Can he feel anything anymore? Now he just stares into the abyss, occassionally mumbling and looking from side to side.
Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve wished I could get a glimpse of what he sees/hears. To understand why they take his attention away from the things here in our world. Why are those voices louder than mine?
My dad is lost. -and I am lost trying to find him again. What if there is no white rabbit, and the looking glass is just a facade? Should we continue the search just for an adventure after all?
In other words, coping with a declining parent with SZ is amazingly difficult.