When my 18 year old son isn’t doing well, I make suggestions to him. If he is able to have a conversation about it we do, sometimes he follows my suggestions and sometimes he doesn’t. But if he is irritated by them or by me, I drop it for the time being. I have found that stress makes his symptoms as well as mood and behaviors worse. So I’ve learned to pick my battles and leave a negative or stressful situation alone. You can always try again another time.
I’d like to add, a dangerous situation changes that. Action must be taken in a dangerous situation. When my son refused his meds for about two months he became a danger to himself, and angry with me for suggesting the hospitaI. I calmly left the house, called 911, and returned with them to get him safely to the hospital where he needed to be to get help. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do, but it was the right thing and he got the help he needed, and back on his meds.
Wow this makes so much sense. Someone in my weekly support group suggested the same explanations.
Hearing this from someone who actually has gone through it really opens my eyes!
I am going to revisit this topic with my daughter and get her the necessary help.
Thank you so much for your help!
Thank you for your response
Your answer make a lot of sense and are quite what I was expecting.
This sounds a lot like me.
Good to hear I’m not alone.
Yes I’ve put up with a lot of weird stuff believe me I have lots of stories but I draw the line when I sense my daughter might harm herself or someone else.
She has only been hospitalized twice since the age of 18 she’ll be 20 in two months.
Both times she was hospitalized I was the one that called because of her violent behavior. There were a lot of other violent episodes but some I managed to calm her down or she ran away. I know that this is only the beginning of the nightmare.
@Rarity I should have used a pointer to tag my response above. If you saw it an it didn’t fit, I understand. I just didn’t want you to miss what could be useful data about the upshots of borderlinism (and/or histrionic borderlinism) when it is confronted by over-stressed, and litigation-wary, metal health professionals.
I will look into that thank you.
You are NOT alone! I would let doctors know about these violent behaviors towards you and your other children.
I would go to court over this if I had to…well, I have.
I would not let her stay with you unless she is stable, and taking injections instead of pills-so you know that she is medicated. There may also be drugs involved.
Honestly it sounds like she needs to go to a state hospital for an extended stay until they can tweak her meds and get her some semblance of order in her behavior. I don’t know though because it’s your call being your kid because state hospital stays can be very long. I know first hand how it can feel having someone “betray” you and call the cops on you to be taken to the hospital but I didn’t think of it as that despite I felt like it but I have way more rationality than the average human.
Sounds familiar. Yes, from what I’ve learned in NAMI and have read and experienced, this is a common pattern with this illness. I’ve also read, including from some people here, that long periods of general health and stability are possible with the right combination of treatment, medication and support. There is hope, let’s hold on to it! Stay strong and be well 