Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

He was really mean today.....and that is not something he has ever been

Well I am extremely concerned about him related to any discharge.

He called me today, which I believe was prompted by his therapist related to making family connections. It is the first time I have talked to him since my experience with him on Sunday, and the first time he has called me at all since he has been in the hospital (he has been in for a month). He continues to believe the only reason he is there is because I “put him there.”

The strange thing was that he wanted to know if I would let him come home to my house. That is shocking to my husband and I. He has been nothing but angry with me. I told him that I would, but there would need to be some safeguards in place and assurances that he would work toward wellness and stability. He openly admitted (and as I expected) that he was only planning on saying he would follow a discharge plan, but he was not planning on doing it. His plan was to say he was coming to my house and turning around and leaving from there. He talks about going homeless as if it is appealing.

All the while in our phone conversation, he would drop away from the conversation we were having and would respond to a conversation in his head, he then would resume our talk and was telling me he doesn’t need medication, that there is nothing wrong with him…and then would respond to something he told me that he heard me say under my breath. Hmmmm. I was hoping that 2+ weeks of meds, and his 3rd Invega shot yesterday, would allow us to recover a little insight…but so far, still fixed beliefs, delusions, and responding to voices. The best thing about the Invega shots so far is he is at least talking and interacting. He struggles to suppress all of his symptoms…but he still keeps much of this illness to himself.

Will they discharge him if he isn’t willing to acknowledge the significance of his illness, especially if they know he is not likely follow a discharge plan? Can I impact the discharge plan because of him telling me the things he does? I would welcome any wisdom on what…if any…power I have in this process. They told me that the soonest discharge would be 3rd week of March…the latest would be mid-April.

My leaning is not to have him discharge to our home, as he views where we live as an easy place to fall under the radar. He is somewhat correct. I live in a town of 100 people and am 70 miles from the grocery store, much less anything else. It often takes 1-2 hours to get a county sheriff to where we live for any needs. It is also very isolating here, and there is not any work.

Oh…the wild ride we all have in this life with our loved ones. Thank you all for listening!

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With the level of symptoms he is experiencing along with his plans, I think you should be as frank with the treatment team as you are here on the forum. “No, he can’t come home” means they might treat him longer.

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Yes, you should tell the doctor’s his actual plan to keep him in there longer.

Hello, Your post really hit the mark with me. I have also experienced a lot of what you write about, the mean-ness, the threatening looks. My son is now 26 and has been ill for 7 years. He has reacted in many ways to his medications or not at all. This last hospitalization he was put on Abilify depot injection plus some zyprexa during the day. I told the psychiatrist that I felt that it made him “manic” but mostly that it had changed his personality. He was always a kind, loving, smart guy. He has become intolerable and the psychiatrist has labelled him as antisocial personality disorder. But I feel that it is due to the meds. We have no other options for meds now because he has tried most injectables and refuses orals. I have to stay far away from him beyond the care and support that i HAVE to give. My interaction with him is always short and distant because I feel that it is safer that way, I often have to cut phone conversations short because he will start verbally abusing me. It is heartbreaking. I try to think of this person as someone that is not my child but that i have to be polite to. I am so sorry that you are also going through this. I hope that some of the behaviours will level off with time maybe? I think it is important to not change our threshold for abusive behaviour because it will make you sick in the long run. Hope this message is helpful.

Thank you for your words, @camlav, it truly is heartbreaking. I simply continue to remind myself that this is schizophrenia talking, this is not my son. We are 2 months into invega injections, and I continue to learn who my son is in this illness now that he is finally on medication. I am fearful of what will happen after this month, though…as April 28th is his last court ordered injection. He is home from the hospital, and is staying with me for now. We have completed SSI applications and hope with the clinical data submission, he will qualify for some assistance so we can find something better suited for him. We live too rural and the isolation where we are at (70 miles from even a grocery store) is a challenge for him in this illness. His agitation has improved greatly with the medication…but it is an imperfect science, that is for sure. I decided last month to find a therapist for myself…someone experienced with severe mental illness so that I can better navigate what is on the horizon. I have seen her twice, and it is a good fit. It helps to have someone as a sound board…but quite honestly, it is the wisdom in this forum and the helpful responses like yours that have made all the difference for me in this journey. Thank you…and wishing you the very best in your own journey with your son.

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My mother has said similar things to me.
My brother did too
Then my daughter said exactly the same, almost word by word.
When all of them say the same or similar things, you know it is not they who talk. It is the zc talking.

With meds the noncence goes away. Kind of…
I am considering guardianship as well. If my daughter will stop her meds, the guardianship is what i will go for.

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The first time my daughter was in hospital, I stopped visiting for 11 days. My eldest daughter lived too far to visit. I regret this line of action.

The second time shewas in hospital, I visited every day even though she refused seeing me. I brought treats for the staff. Eventually, my daughter came around. She knows i cared and was there every day. Her interpretations of the events have now changed for better.
Stay with your son. He might be just very scared!

Talk to doctors about the AOT/CTO
Write a letter explaining that your loved one has a history of not taking meds

Your comment was helpful

I am making mental notes, in order to get approval for the CTO for the next 6 months, i will include in my letter:

  • has a history of refusing to take meds
  • had a great improvement when on CTO
  • her insight is only partial; therefore a great risk that would stop taking meds if not on CTO

Keep communicating with the doctors and staff. He is not ready to be discharged. you may have to refuse to take him home in order to keep him in the hospital (and on meds) longer.