So, for those of you that don’t know the experience with my son, he is 20, and in his second hospitalization. His first was in Jul '16 while in college where he was unwilling to take medication, deescalated during his short stay, and because he was no longer psychotic, he was discharged home. He remained unwilling to follow a discharge plan, unwilling to allow HIPPA auth, unwilling to take medication, and after 6 months of Sz decline, I pursued guardianship and ultimately he unraveled to a point where we petitioned the court for an involuntary hospitalization. Where we live, once hospitalized, there is an additional hearing for involuntary medication and that occurred. He received oral doses and had his first Invega shot last Thursday. He is continuing with oral doses, and they plan on giving him another injection on Thursday. This is the first regular medication he has had in this journey, he has been hospitalized for a month, and there is not a discharge plan yet.
I have been told that he is an individual that significantly suppresses/dissimulates symptoms (I agree), and he is so skilled and practiced at hiding his issues that the more severe he became, and in the month before we had him hospitalized, he was nearly catatonic and lost in his head most of the time. He would rotate out of that and into severe agitation, sleeplessness (among many other things) and was alcohol and drug seeking to resolve the layers of his discomfort.
His doctor said that cases like his drastically change when they start medication. He said that he is likely to appear like he has become much more ill…and we expected that, but I did not expect what we have had this week. Today, he was not only arguing his long standing fixed beliefs and delusions, he came out with new things and was simply mean. I didn’t know how to receive him. I struggle to say this about my son, but he was almost creepy in the way he tried to intimidate me in some of the strange things he was saying, his eye contact was bizarre and had a language all in its own…and he was entertained by my emotions. “Go ahead an cry you liar…the devil loves you.” Although his comments didn’t make sense to me, he would continue to look at me and say hurtful, rude, or mean things and I have never known him to be anything like what I saw today. Bizarre stories, sure. Odd line of thinking, sure…but this was so personal.
I wondered if it was because he has suppressed anger related to me, suppressed delusions that he has never spoken out loud related to me? Have any of you experienced something like this? I know enough not to take it personally…but it was so hard to handle, I told him that I wouldn’t tolerate him treating me that way and left. I decided to give the medication more time and take a break from visits. I don’t know if hat is the right decision, but I struggle to shoulder what I experienced today. Any thoughts?