My uncle has been living in my mum’s home since I was around 4 years old. That’s 26 years ago. When I was 8, he showed signs of mental illness but never received medical or therapeutic help. Since I became unemployed two years ago, I have been living in my mum’s home and during that time, my uncle has been physically violent towards me thrice. He becomes aggressive over anything (touching dishes he might be using, using something he wants to use but hasn’t told anyone, someone else watching the TV when he wants it off, telling him not to do something etc). He also enters my room at will so now I keep my door locked.
A few weeks he pushed me across the house twice on different occasions for asking him not to use expensive dishes as a tray and using my furniture as a dining table (he told me the furniture wasn’t mine because I am too young to afford anything). A few days later, I was sat in the living room by myself watching TV in the early hours of the morning. My uncle walked in and opened the windows which left me feeling very cold. Trying to avoid upsetting him, I asked my mum, who was in her room at the time, if I could close the window. She asked me why I was in the living room in the first place. Surprised by her response, I have avoided all common areas of the house except the bathroom because I worry that if he does anything to hurt me, they will blame me for triggering it. So now, I keep to my room.
A week after that incident, I wrote to my mum and my uncle and aunty (mum’s siblings) asking them to consider providing him treatment or alternative living accommodation. While I know I could easily leave my mum’s home I am worried about my younger sisters (14 and 16 years old) who have to live in fear at home. If I move out because of him, it will only make it more likely they won’t want to be home either. Neither my mum nor her brother and sister have mentioned anything to me about the letter or the recent violent incidents. My grandmother, who was present when he attacked me and tried to shield me, made an emotional appeal to my mum to have him moved because she was worried for my safety but my mum has said nothing to her.
Living in fear of being harmed at home is very stressful. It saddens me that no one cares whether me or any or my siblings are harmed. The first time he hit me, my aunt’s only concern was whether my uncle was OK. Instead, she was angry with me for reasons I do not understand. My mum gets angry with me that I avoid interacting with him even though he has been verbally and physically violent to me. Honestly, I am very confused by all this. I would be grateful if someone could help me understand why my family protect him and seem not to care if he physically hurts me or my siblings.