Hi Everyone. Sorry for the long post but I am so lost on what to do.
My dad was diagnosed with schizophrenia when I was 3. My parents divorced and I would spend summers at my grandparents where my dad lived. I remember growing up so angry that he was sick. I didn’t understand and wanted him to just shake it off. I was embarrassed that he acted different than other dads.
When I was 15 I began dating a person my grandfather didn’t approve of so I wasn’t allowed back. Since my dad didn’t drive I didn’t see him again until my grandfather got sick…I was now 40. My grandparents always took care of my dad and now they are gone my family just threw this responsibility on me. It sounds terrible but I don’t know him and don’t have that connection. I love him but my patience is not what it should be for a person with mental health. I have taken him to a dr and got invega which helps but he still has paranoid spells. He lives 3 hrs away so I depend on family to help me but they only take advantage of him. I took over his finances to make sure his bills are paid. I tried to find assisted living around me but I can’t afford it and due to his little disability check each month he isn’t eligible for Medicaid. I am so lost on how to handle this situation and anyone I try to talk to isn’t in this situation so they don’t understand.
How can I let go of my anger and look at him as my dad and not a burden. I feel like crap but I don’t know how to help him. Thank you for listening and hopefully understanding.