Hello. Late last year my oldest son reached out to me after 2 decades of not being allowed to speak with me. He informed me that he is schizophrenic. (I hope I spelled that correctly.) He lives 2000 miles away and is in a long term relationship. He has a daughter, and his fiancé has a son. He is in therapy and has told me he is very glad I am back in his life. Are there any do’s and don’ts I should know about?
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My personal preference, though there are others here who disagree, (fine people in their own right) is to be careful using “is”. (I know noun, adverb, all reaching) My thinking is that living with schizophrenia is not what defines our family members.
Remember that our family members are highly sensitive and you will need to learn your way gradually into his life.
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Hi Hope. Thank you for your response. I am still very confused. I myself am a disabled person due to an industrial injury. I would willingly do anything to allow my son to be…I don’t even know the proper words to use.
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To me, it sounds like your son is in a good place in his life. What is it you want him to be?
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Hello, in my personal experience the most enlightening source of information and education on schizophrenia and mental illness in general, (besides this forum) was the free NAMI class called “Family to Family” I thought I was somewhat knowledgeable before I went but attending the course made me realize how little I actually knew, and I came away with a wealth of important and useful information and a few new connections for support as well. I hope that there is a chapter near you and if not, you can always call them as they can offer resources by phone that can be helpful. The class however is priceless. Here’s the link, (NAMI Family-to-Family | NAMI: National Alliance on Mental Illness)
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Does NAMI have any type of online tutorials to help families remotely?
I googled family to family zoom - sorry I don’t have time to look more into it in detail - please let us know what you discover - they have dates for two upcoming courses
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This is GREAT! They have the course through Zoom! Once a week for 8 weeks, 2.5 hours per class (every Tuesday or Wednesday evenings). I just signed up and waiting for more information about the course and booklets via email. Thank you!
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Update on the Zoom sessions never came. I was not sent the link to the courses and no further emails after my registration were sent. I’m assuming this is just available to U.S residents. =(
I am so sorry, they could have at least communicated with you.
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Lately, I’ve come to embrace the term diagnosed, since it implies a past professional opinion based on presumed objective standards which may or may not still apply or been correct to begin with. I note with dismay that the term “Schizo” (as a generic synonym for crazy) has crept into young people’s vocabulary. As a whole they are less bothered by the stigma of many other lesser mental illnesses than earlier generations, so it’s especially disappointing.
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I too, have observed that the younger generation is more accepting of differences. Hopefully, this is a trend that will continue into the future. I think our biggest struggle is that the general public seems to suffer from anosognosia when it comes to our family members and their needs.
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