Since my brother began his struggle with Schizophrenia almost 5 years ago I have felt a great sense of loss and loneliness at every turn. I have had no idea how to reach out and help, and much of the time I clung to denial like much of my family. Just reading your thoughts and feelings on this forum has filled me with this incredible feeling that I haven’t been alone in my pains.
I live and work far away from my family, and my brother lives on his own, but I know he’s in pain. He isn’t active, he uses drugs, and I’m not sure about his friends. He’s just not dealing with his condition. Meanwhile, my mom and dad both dwell on the past. I think they feel guilty, and sometimes I feel guilty too when I read about how a closer, supportive family can help prevent and treat sz.
I just want us all to stop with the denial. I wish I could say the magic words that would make my parents supportive, understanding, strong, and guilt-free. But we weren’t any of those things before. What do I even say them about all this?
I think that your brother has chosen self-medication. But don’t feel like its all over, he will likely burn out. I self medicated and got sick of having to drink so much and finally took medication and sobered up. As for your parents, I don’t know what they can do- If he is on his own, they might just be out of the picture. Maybe an intervention would be appropriate. I was high-functioning while unmedicated, but they still tried to convince me to take meds. It wasnt until I had a moment of clarity, when I saw how stupid it was to keep fighting a life-threatening illness with alcohol was, that I became compliant with psychiatry.
The good new is, there is hope for him to clean up and get treatment. He sounds like he is in denial, but denial only lasts for a while until something happens to him. Maybe his dealer will be dry, maybe he will just see what he is doing, something may make him see clearly. But you can only talk to him, not change him, remember that. It will be his decision to get clean and take prescribed pills.
You may have read some of my other posts with links.
There is a condition called anosognosia which looks like denial but is part of the condition where the patient can not see themselves clearly enough to recognize their mental illness. http://www.treatmentadvocacycenter.org/problem/anosognosia
Help to educate your parents and help them to understand that there is no blame. That with the right treatment things can turn around. There is always hope.
I think that if we get caught in what would be ideal situations this would of or could have happened differently we use up needed energy to fight real battles. What I am saying is it is human to feel so. We can not control other people’s reactions so spending time with thought on the perfect situation is non productive. If you keep reading this site you are not alone.and never really alone if you believe in a higher power (Jesus helps me) When I think of all my son could of been all cut short at 18 yrs. He is 34 years old today and in a mental hospital again. I read this site everyday at work. I do not know what I would do without it.