Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

Losing patience with situation

I have a 19 yr old with schizophrenia. He is compliant with meds, but they are not right. He still has paranoid delusions and gets angry with me and his 16 yr old brother because of them. From the time I wake up till the time he goes to sleep, he is constantly asking the same thing. He says there is something in him. Sometimes he thinks its a split other times he thinks its a hallucination. He asks me what it is all day everyday. He gets angry if I disagree. If I say yes he says that? That? Everytime I have to answer yes but not too fast. I did it all the way home from work the other day. I tell people I have no patience for this. I end up getting frustrated and yelling or just crying. I don’t know what to do but I feel like he would be better off somewhere else. I am not made to do this. I feel like I am going to end up in the mental hospital and then what happens to him. He takes meds but refuses to do therapy, case management, assisted living, group homes. He gets mad when I mention anything to the contrary of him being independent. He can shower, feed himself, ect. but doesnt shop, drive, work, or go to school and because he is an adult I can’t force gim to do anything. I don’t know what to do. I think a group home would be ideal but don’t know how to get him to try it.

2 Likes

Contact the psychiatrist and ask for assistance and resources.

1 Like

Brown. I’ve experienced very similar issues with my 19 year old SZ son and his younger siblings. Please know: (1) you’re not alone, (2) you’ve come to a great place to read and commiserate, and (3) you’ve found some experienced caregivers who can help you.

Please read ‘I’m Not Sick and Don’t Need Help’. There are no ‘cures’. There are no easy answers. But if you want to try, and if you want to grind it out with rest of us through very similar shitshows, then buckle up.

2 Likes

I feel your pain. My sister does NOTHING except talk about her delusions and dumps it all on me. She’s holding me back in life and I can’t take it anymore. Sometimes I think schizophrenia should be called “Rampant Selfishness to the point of madness”?
I’m not made to deal with this either. I don’t know what the answer is. If you find out can you let me know too?

1 Like

@brown23455 - First, welcome to our bunch of scrappy soldiers. There have been many days when I feel like I’ve been to hell and back with my 41 year old son who has suffered with SZ for many years. My son has unrealistic expectations as well but often I have to leave him to his own devices. One example is I’ve had to stop going out at midnight or later to find him while he’s riding his bicycle. I now make sure the batteries are working in the headlight and taillight and remind him to turn them on. Doesn’t always work but hey, I keep trying. There are some things you have to let go of and others that I know you can’t. My son has been on so many cocktails that I’ve lost count. He’s highly resistant to medications - even Clozaril. He’s had a number of psychiatrists - some “crazier” than he is - one was a magician who I think was investigated, one had a bodyguard with him during his sessions, and another insisted on wearing dark sunglasses during interviews but not other times. A good psychiatrist is hard to find.

Do you go in with your son during his meetings with the doctor or does your son not allow you to? If not, you might see if you can email the doctor your concerns so he can use them to frame the questions he needs to ask your son without telling him that any information came from you. Find yourself a NAMI or other support group and maybe a counselor. You HAVE to take care of yourself regardless of where your son may end up living. Some of us have been dealing with this crud for years and others are new to the situation. Regardless of what is bothering you, there will be someone here who can say, “been there, done that” and maybe offer suggestions.

Take care, keep reading and try to find out what community resources are available for you. Call your county mental health department and see if they have a list of organizations (and what they do) for the mentally ill. Here in Florida, we have Florida Assertive Community Treatment ( FACT ) teams who can visit the home daily, weekly or otherwise and bring a doctor once a month. Even they no longer deal with my son because I complained about them missing a visit and not following up with us for two days - by which time we were in Georgia visiting family.

Its not easy but many are here to possibly offer insight or just plain ole’ support.

Take care, :palm_tree:

Hi, I feel for you! You’ve come to the right place. Join us, the warriors! This disease of the brain is not going away anytime soon. All I can say is hang in there, communicate with a good psychiatrist to find the right meds for your son. He needs you. Don’t throw in the towel yet although when you sometimes want to do just that. When desperate reach out to the warriors here. You don’t feel alone when you realize that there are people here who are walking the same path that you are. Most of all be strong! You can be strong if you take care of yourself too…go for a run, meditate, call friends (if you have any left🙄), pray if you have faith, eat REALLY healthy food. We keep saying it’s a journey. Don’t know when you get off or where it’s taking you. Until then, keep fighting. Lean on us!

1 Like