My son’s journey into schizophrenia started when he was about 4 or 12 or 14. He made it half way through 10th grade at an arts school and then the psychosis began and the hospitilizations and 5 months in an adolescent treatment facility. He will be 21 next month and has lived with me for 2 years. He is stable and compliant with his meds and I am so grateful for that - when they are not working, I get punched in the head or face. Now, he smokes so much his cough makes him throw up. Mostly outside tho and Im grateful to live in Florida. I got him SSI and I am his “Representative Payee”. I get my support from Co-dependents Anonymous and NAMI.
Everyday is an adventure. I try to practice mindfulness and gratitude and to take care of myself. It is a drain having a disabled child at home again.I stay away from thoughts about what a joyful creative child he was because this is “the new normal”. I grieved what is lost and now I move on. I try to not worry about the future when I am gone. I turn my fears over to a higher power.
You are doing all the right things. Remember to keep your own life and interests going strong. And know that we all know what you are going through, you are not alone in this, you are in my prayers, my darling
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