Hi All,
My finacè’s brother has been diagnosed with schizophrenia and bipolar about 2/3 years ago. He is 22 and he was in the care of his mother whom has had to move in with us (bringing along the schizophrenic son). She has taken 0 initiative to get him help other than 2 separate times she was forced to call the police to take him to the hospital where he’s been admitted both times. Long story short, he knows when and what to say to be released from these facilities and he refuses to take medication. He does nothing all day long and refuses to get help from the state. I understand it is a tough thing for him but we want to see him get help. Now my fiancé is wanting to become his Power of attorney but we have no clue where to start or what to doo be able to make decisions for him. Please help, any advice is appreciated.
It took 5 hospitalizations, 40 visits to our home by police, two arrests and a court order for medication to get my daughter help. She is currently med compliant, has a part time job, and is doing well compared to the 2.5 years of her almost 24/7 psychosis, pre-court-order.
My county has something called “ex-parte Baker Act” which can be filed for by a care-giver to get the person hospitalized through the county court. There is no guarantee however that the person will stay on meds after a forced hospitalization, as I found out, several times.
I thank God daily for the police who arrested my daughter and the judge who ordered meds, as without them, she would still be psychotic and unmedicated. Guardianship here does NOT mean forced medication is allowed.
I don’t think a simple Power of Attorney will allow you to force treatment, but I only know the rules in my county. I suggest you contact NAMI in your area and ask how best to go about forcing treatment for someone who refuses to admit (probably is unable to admit) they are ill. NAMI and this forum were what saved me from hopelessness about getting my daughter help.
@Harlo.Hendrix I have been dealing with my son’s illness for many year now, which has gotten worse since 2015. I was fortunate to be able to get POA when my son was not too deep into his psychosis. He was arrested for disorderly conduct and his car was impounded. I was not able to get his car out of impound without a POA. I attempted to get his authorization by a handwritten release and I had two medical staff witness. It was not accepted by the Police. I had to hire an attorney who actually went to the hospital to have my son sign a POA. Which was not easy convincing him to sign.
@oldladyblue @Harlo.Hendrix from my experience, a POA will not give you authority to force medication. My son has had forced medications at least 3 maybe 4 times. When I was guardian, I was able to authorize the medication; the other times a court hearing had to take place and ordered by the judge to force medication. It has only been a few days now since medication was forced and he still believes he is not sick and wants me to hire an attorney to get him out. This is what happens, they get him stablized in hospital but he still does not believe that he is sick. And there is no convincing him othewise. He gets released and does not want to take medication. NAMI is a huge help, however the crisis center has authority to have someone committed, at least in my area. I had to do this twice. The police will not unless homicide or suicide. The crisis team comes to the home and calls the police (they have the ability to pink slip). NAMI is a great support, but limited to actually taking any part with getting someone the help they need (my belief).
id recommend a mental health club (sometimes called clubhouses), thses are places where a mentally ill person can go to partake in actiivties such as art creative writing and health management…theyre also places where you an drop in for a coffee and a chat
ask his mental health team to fill you in on this or else just google it
sz ia anawful illness, so id recommend you tobe supportive and try your upmost not to stress him…stress exacerbates things
After my experiences I would have set straight boundaries. You can not live here without being med-compliant. There are so many things that can happen if they aren’t properly diagnosed and have a treatment program including medications.
Thank you thank you!
Wow that is a shame. This whole process is so expensive. Good luck to you.
Wow! Thank you! I’ll definitely be googling this today!
I am trying to get my fiancé onboard with the boundaries and sticking to them but I totally agree, thank you!
Have you tried your local mental health mobile crisis team?
They may be able to get through to him and give you a list of resources in your area.
The more you can learn about this disease and how others are handling it in your area, the more ideas you will have. NAMI support groups and classes are to help you learn so you can make the hard choices facing your family.
This site, and the Reddit schizophrenia sub-Reddit, and NAMI were what helped to educate me, besides other online reading from treatment centers and drug manufacturers. Visits by the police helped too, as each time I learned something new about what is and isn’t possible when someone is mentally ill and just doesn’t know it. I met several people in this area who are also battling the battle by being caregivers. I have a monthly breakfast with another parent. It helps a LOT to know you aren’t alone in this war.
Anosognosia was something I never heard of and never thought would be possible in my “pre-knowing about MI” life.
Even though my daughter is medicated since Dec 2018, she still doesn’t know she is mentally ill. She is compliant with the p-doc now because I told her she has to follow the judge’s order (back in January when there WAS a judge’s order) and the doctor’s orders, so she didn’t end up back in jail or back in the hospital. She hasn’t seen the improvement in herself that those around her see as, to her, there was never anything wrong with her. She cannot see the delusions or hallucinations she’s had as anything other than real.
Wow thank you so much. It is hard for me being that it is my fiancé’s brother and I can’t do much, I relay the advice I get on here and information I read online but it seems to be a waste. They feel it will not help so they just kind of “cope” instead of trying to find solutions. I understand this will be a life long struggle but I refuse to sit around and do nothing 
I’m happy to hear you’ve had some progress. Good luck:heart:
I haven’t, I will look into this, thank you.
When my daughter was first ill, we had to learn to cope with her psychotic outbursts. It was terribly hard. As time passed, we got smart and divided up the house so that her room was separated from the rest of the house to give us some peace from the fairly constant out-loud babble she talked to her “friends”. Sometimes the talking turned into yelling, it was very unnerving, and made it very hard for me to rest at night. Since you will most likely not be able to handle your fiancee’s brother as you are not related, you must try to make a priority to care for your own health and your fiancee’s health. Caregiving is very wearing emotionally and physically.
Not much new advice. It’s good to hire a lawyer for poa and do repeat hospital visits. I would tell the emergency doctor he is violent homicidal or suicidal and they will be forced to admit him and take it more seriously. Or try a different hospital as some will admit you for longer. I recommend an injection if non med compliant. I was on the Invega shot for a while. It’s once per month. I felt a little tired on it and gained a little weight, but overall it helped me.