Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

Psychology Today - 8 Ways to Talk to Difficult People

Published on November 26, 2014 by in

I have an allergy to superiority.

Start talking down to me or patronizing me in a belittling tone and I can feel my blood pressure rise. My nervous system gets triggered and I have to work hard at assuring it (me) that I am safe and to please calm down because I don’t want to react and get defensive with the person who is (or whom I feel is) demeaning me (and sometimes they’re not). Getting defensive would only exacerbate the situation and I would lose a chance to learn something, my own sense of inner peace and self-confidence, or a valued relationship.

The perfect depiction of this situation is when Bruce Banner feels a threat and begins to transform into the Incredible Hulk. He leaves quite a mess behind (and completely ruins his clothes, which I can’t afford to do).

This post, then, is for anyone that has to deal with people who are difficult and who push our Hulk buttons. The key: Don’t let them win. Try these advanced people strategies instead. You could even call them ninja strategies, after the specially trained sneaky assassins. These skills are designed to help you shut down your trigger, so that you can leave a confrontation with your dignity intact.