My husband with sz has been having massive anger outbursts. He screamed obscenities at me while he was driving our car with me in it. I can’t take it anymore. He won’t take any medication because he said the medication made him feel “sad” all the time, he seemed happy to me. I hate this disease, it ruins lives. It’s been chaos. I guess, for right now, he is better off by himself. I think our relationship was too much for him. Just the everyday stresses of a relationship I think is too much for him. I have a feeling he may just be better managing his illness on his own. He loves me, but I think he is trying to tell me he needs to live on his own. Which sucks, but it is what it is, and I have to accept it.
Withdrawal from loved ones due to the stress of psychosis is a common reaction. If the meds make him feel sad then suggest taking an antidepressant too.
It can be hard and frustrating but but trying different meds and med combinations is the best way to go. Don’t give up, don’t let him give up. There’s a better life without psychosis. He just has to keep trying to find what works. Being unmedicated does not work
I would highly recommend that if one medication is giving him sideffects he doesn’t like then to try another. It’s a process to find the right med, but it can be done.
I’m sza and spent years on the sz forum side. There are many drugs to try.
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I’ve discussed medication a lot with my SzA brother.
I try to keep encouraging him by pointing out a few facts that seem to help:
- Medication is very complicated and takes adjustment often to get the right effect. As your body chemistry changes, medication has to be adjusted to compensate. Things like diet, exercise and sleep have an impact. Also things we can’t control like age and genetics. Working with the doctor and being honest about how you feel is the only way to get it figured out.
- The medication is intended to help you be more independent, have a better quality of life and avoid the worst parts of the disorder.
- Refusing to take medication and participate in a treatment plan pushes an unreasonable degree of stress, responsibility and consequences on the people who care about you most.
- Cycling on and off medication is terrible for your body and damaging to your mental health. When a doctor determines that you need medication, you must take it exactly as they prescribe. The effectiveness and side effects have to be observed to make educated decisions on adjustments.
- The goal of your doctors, family and everyone who cares about you is to help you gain the peace of mind, independence and quality of life you deserve. As long as you try, all of those people will be there for you, no matter how hard things get. If you refuse to try, you hurt the people who care about you.
- You deserve to try. You deserve to feel good about yourself and the direction your life is headed.
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Can you get away? Even for a few days? You could use a break and it might give you time to weigh your options ( without being screamed at).
My Sz husband once screamed at me while I was driving on the NJ Parkway on the way to see some friends. I had to find a place to turnaround and drive him back home to drop him off.
Thanks wreklus for your comment. I’ve talked to him about these things, but he says he just wants to give it a little more time. I’ve stopped pushing about the meds and he is better today. I told him I support him with whatever decisions he makes, but I won’t tolerate the screaming anymore. I watch to see signs he is getting agitated, then leave before he loses it. The screaming is violent and abusive. I can’t tolerate it. He does have a more peaceful look on his face though, and he even laughed at my jokes. He was caring and attentive when I was not feeling good and took care of me, so that gives me a little hope.
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The question that ended up being a turning point for my brother when he asked himself:
Give it more time for what?
What comes of waiting and hoping for things to change?
When is ‘hanging on’ or ‘dealing with it’ ever progressive change in a direction any of us want?
What reason is there to believe the problems will just fade away with time, when it’s clear they have only become more difficult without continuous care and attention to treat them?
This isn’t a fever or a cold. It doesn’t fix itself.
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