Lately my son talks in different sounding voices than his own usual voice, speaking different sides to conversations in these voices. This is a lot different than the usual him talking back to the voices in his regular voice. I wonder if anyone else’s loved one experiences this. When he speaks to us he will also whisper an order like he is saying what he’s hearing out loud before he actually says it to us. Ex. he will whisper " Tell her you don’t want to go to the store" and then he will say to me directly “I don’t want to go to the store” I think he thinks we can’t hear the first part. He has zero insight and considers himself busy all day doing nothing but carrying on like this. He can get quite carried away.
He is on an extremely slow titration of a retrial of Clozopine. So far it’s not doing much but he hasn’t got any worse or had too many adverse affects. I honestly don’t know if it will help or if this is as good as it gets. My heart just breaks daily for him. He seems content to just go get a soda each day. I am usually able to get him to shower or some other hygiene if I take him for a soda. We do go out to dinner and for the first time in a long time we went to a movie and he sat through it. We were able to do this mostly because he hasn’t been pacing as much as before. He was talking most of the time but I was able to get him to whisper and the movie was loud so it was all good. I am just always looking for a spark of joy from him.
We don’t leave him alone at all. He’s supervised all the time. He has an opportunity for more services but refuses to sign any paperwork because he was told not to sign anything that comes his way he says. The very sad part is that he seemed like he wanted to do it. They would offer 3 services a week such as going out to get a soda or things he wants to do. He likes to go for drives, get soda or go to the store to get beverages that’s about it. We are considering conservatorship but concerned he will get very mad and at the current moment he is fairly manageable. 100% med compliant but those things can change at any time. He will be 21 soon and fixates on what he will drink and how he can stop meds to do it. He has Autism too so he can really fixate on this.