Success story - hope

Family
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Hello everyone

I was diagnosed with schizophrenia in 2014. For 10 years I was unable to work and was afraid to leave my home.

After trying many different med combos, I finally found one that enabled me to return to work. I started working 10-12 hours a week in 2024 at a retail store. 3.5 months ago I went back to working in an office Monday through Friday.

I’m telling you all this because it’s possible to improve even if it takes a long time. I still have beliefs others say are false, but I now keep them to myself and go on about my days. I’m extremely devoted to taking my meds for life.

I hope this offers you all a glimmer of hope for your loved ones.

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Thanks for sharing Zannah. I really appreciate it. It does give me hope. I’m rooting for you! Team Zannah YEAH!

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Thanks @IansDad . I appreciate that.

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Can you share with us what treatment worked for you?

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Yes @hopeisahead . I take 20 mg of olanzapine and 1 mg of risperidone. I always need a high dose of an antipsychotic. Yet one antipsychotic wasn’t enough. Adding the second one calms my mind down just enough that I can leave the house.

Then, I started a therapy program where I learned coping skills to manage stress (we used dialectical behavior skills that are usually for people with borderline personality disorder even though I don’t have that).

Also, for several years before the new med combo I did reality testing with my husband and my therapist. Mostly my therapist because I don’t like discussing it with family because it upsets them too much. If I’m honest, reality testing didn’t work for me until I added the risperidone to the high dose olanzapine.

Even now, I still believe a group of navy seals is watching me and they’re recording everything I do and say. But my meds calm me down enough that I put that thought aside and go to work anyway. I also use my skills I learned to cope with stress as stress makes me feel much worse. And I don’t talk to others about my beliefs as I realize it sounds bizarre and upsets people.

Something important to note is that I’m not violent. I never have been. I’m fearful and I hide in my house when I’m scared. I ask my husband to go places with me as my protector when I’m scared.

The vast majority of people who have schizophrenia are actually more likely to become a victim of crime rather than to be the one doing the crime. This is a fact you can google. So it’s very unfair of the media to portray people with schizophrenia as all being violent perpetrators of crime.

I hope this helps

I’ll also tag @IansDad in case you’re interested too

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Hey there @Zannah, yes there is hope, you may have seen my story on the other forums.

I was first hospitalized in 1980 at age 19. I had been having problems for the year leading up to my diagnosis but I think acid and marijuana triggered my schizophrenia though I am sure I would have become schizophrenic without the drugs. I got my first taste of suffering in that first hospital and after a week and a half I was released to Soteria House, a world famous, experimental home for schizophrenics.

Their credo was that by putting people with schizophrenia in a house in the middle of a community and without the use of medication and by staffing the house with young, empathetic, friendly, tolerant and open minded counselors who had no psychiatric training or experience, that they could get better results then using medication or hospitals. They claimed a success rate better than hospitals but this was disputed by others in the psychiatric field. One of the founders of Soteria wrote a book about it called Soteria: Through Madness to Deliverance by Voyce Hendrix and Loren Mosher.

Anyways it might have helped some people but it didn’t help me, I lived there and suffered terribly the whole time. I was severely ill and psychotic and after a year I moved back into my parents apartment where I lasted a week before I had to be hospitalized again. I was in a small Kaiser facility and then at the advice of doctors my parents put me in a long term hospital.

Again, more suffering but at least now I was finally put on medication there. It didn’t help me get better but it stopped me from getting much, much worse. After 8 months I moved from the hospital to a nice, clean, safe group home in Palo Alto, California near Stanford University. I joined a vocational program and I became stable and 9 months later I got a job at a hot tub joint which were popular in California during the 1980’s.

A lot happened to me after that but now I am looking back on being employed almost steadily for the past 42 years at different jobs, I got my college degree in my illness, owned and drove cars since 1997, and lived independently in regular society from 1995-2015. I stayed out of the hospital for twenty years until my mom died in 2015 and I got suicidal and had to go in the hospital for two days. I was back in the mental health system and I lived in another group home for almost two years then moved into supported housing and shared a small apartment with a roommate.

I just moved back into regular society 7 months ago and I’m renting a studio in a complex for low income people. I’ve been at my janitor job for 15 years now. It pays pretty well and I got a nice 2012 Volkswagen Jetta to drive. I realize not everybody is as lucky as me but the point of my story is that 46 years ago when I was in Soteria I saw no hope and I felt like giving up all the time and I suffered terribly. No one in my family or the counselors and then later the nurses in the long term hospital would ever have predicted I would ever do anything with my life.

I was really, really ill, but with medication and family support and plenty of help I pulled through. I keep to myself now by choice but for years I had friends and did lots of fun things with them and my family. I traveled a little, I was even best man at my dad’s wedding to my stepmom.

I get SSDI still but I need to work if I am going to live independently. I take care of myself and manage my money and make and keep all my doctors appointments and take care of any business that comes up with the DMV or the SSA or Medi-cal or medicare or the bank or my car insurance company etc.

As I got older my symptoms became better and more manageable and less intense and if everybody leaves me alone I get something close to peace of mind and my mind slows down, no more racing thoughts that I had for years. Like I said, I know not everybody is as lucky as me but I know of other success stories. I felt like giving up for years but I’m sure glad I didn’t. And by the way, I have had schizophrenia for 45 years and have never gotten violent.

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@777nick777 Thank you for sharing your story. People need to have that hope and know it’s possible to get better (even if not perfectly better) with schizophrenia.

Soteria sounds like a nightmare to me. I’d be worried everyone would be feeding off each other’s delusions etc.

And your story gives me hope too so thank you for that

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Thank you both for giving us on this forum more insight into how you experience the world and what is helping you. Many of us assume that positive, loving contact with our dear ones, the more the better, is what many people experiencing SZ need and want. But it’s clear that this is very often exactly what they want the least. I have a very old, dear, unmedicated friend who sometimes comes out of withdrawal to engage (only online.) But then he retreats for weeks, months, or longer. It is baffling and very sad. That doesn’t stop me from sending an occasional message of support, an interesting link, etc. But I learned that it’s probably best for both of us if I don’t expect any answer. I’ve learned to accept that communication has to be on his terms, and that usually means little or none at all. Still, I hope that knowing I am there for him gives him a little comfort in moments of insight.

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That’s very kind of you to reach out every so often. Most wouldn’t do that. You’re a saint!

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What a beautiful blessing you are to your friend. Deep in my heart I have to believe that those check-ins do mean something to our friends and loved ones. I’ve accepted that my un-medicated sister does not want any communication, and if she does reach out, it’s on her terms. It’s a hard pill to swallow but I have peace with it.

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