Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

Beginning of a new life


#1

Hello to all,
I’m new at this forum. I’m married with my wife for 13 years and we have 4 year old daughter. Our life started to change about 3-4 months ago. My wife started to act different, she started to tell me that she has new kind of energy and can now talk to her dead grandfather and can make astral-travels. After those 2-3 weeks ago she accused me and my mom to do magic on her and trying to kill her. I was schocked and terrified. At the end she claimed that she will be Virgin Mary and we have to divorce for the sake of everything. We had lot of those kind of events happened and i want to a psychiatrist and explained what we lived. He directly said that she is having a paraniod schizophrenia attack and must need medical treatment. But the thing is she is ignoring me for everything. Then i took my mother-in-law to that psychiatrist to explain the situation and he also told her that her daughter has paraniod schizophrenia and needs medical treatment. My wife acceppted to go to the psychiatrist with her mom 3 weeks later to help her. But she ignores that she is so well.

But my main problem is also psychiatrist suggested me to divorce because i do not have chance to continue a marraige with a mental illness like that. But i don’t need comfortable leaving my wife in that situation, it feels me unethical.
I need advice from people that has lived that kind of things, i would be really glad to hear some good things :slight_smile:
Thanks


#2

Your story is very much like mine. Last year we went through the fanciful beliefs and delusions. She was a god, there were ufos flying overhead and alien groups out to get her and other people. Fortunately those thoughts have largely gone now and we are just stuck in the routine where she believes any time I ask her to do something that I am trying to control her and she must resist at all cost. We have had diagnosis but she is unable to comprehend and denies there is anything amiss.

The advice to divorce is made with some good intention as you are in for the long haul here. If you don’t have the patience and love for this person- which means for better and for worse, then this will really test your abilities. After a lot of soul searching I have made the decision to stay together and find a way through this no matter what. My wife didn’t chose what is happening to her and she has no ability (today) to reason with it. She is also still my best friend.

The issue you may also be stuck in is that since she is not a danger to herself or to the general public, she does not qualify for involuntary treatment. If she has little insight into the illness then there is no official thing you can do. There must be millions of people around the world stuck in this trap, just be thankful that you aren’t stuck in the revolving door that is mental health services.


#3

What a total jerk to say that to someone going through this. Who are they to say that.


#4

Well he is a licensed psychiatrist but that really made me feel uncomfortable that’s why i’m looking for someone new to make a new diagnosis.


#5

Dear engineerguy,
Thank you for your detailed and great advice. Your respond gave me really good opinions of what i can and can’t do about the situation. Thank you again so much …


#6

@sercany. Years ago in the 1960’s I knew a family who’s father had a complete breakdown and lost touch with reality. He was 36 years old when it first happened. Back then mental hospitals were more available and this father spent almost a year in one of those hospital. He never returned to “normal” but was medicated so that he didn’t suffer paranoia, hallucinations and delusions. His wife and children took care of him and he was very much loved by his family. He died in his 40’s but I saw the family as being close and nurturing toward the husband/father.


#7

That is a sweet story. I too think the story of our lives and how we care for our loved ones is being watched by others. I hope they see love and support when they see our family. We’re definitely close.


#8

My grandfather’s sister was like that.

She was one of my favorite aunts, but the family always referred to her as being “nervous” and that she had a “nervous breakdown” one time. I remember my grandfather would say, there’s nothing wrong with her, it’s just all those mean-*ss kids she had. I was too young to remember her being really sick, but remember she was a little anxious but very nice.

She did have a lot of kids, back to back, pretty young - and they were definitely a handful.

I think she lived into her 60s, but you could tell that her husband always kept an eye on her and made sure things went OK for her. He was one of the nicest men I think I’ve ever met - very kind and funny.