My wife is currently going through her 3rd episode of psychosis in four years. She is adamant that she doesn’t have a MH condition and that I have nothing to worry about. Even though she shown me a discharge report which said schizophrenia unspecified. She is never violent but in the past has done some things that seriously put into question her reputation and mine (I’m a targeted individual in her episodes).
I don’t think I can do this any more. We have known each other since we were 11 and married for 5 years last week. No children. I feel guilt and sadness for thinking of leaving. I am most sad for what her future will hold as her family (mainly her father) is not understanding how quickly you need to get a person who is experiencing psychosis help.
What do I do? How do I move past those feelings. So I can make a decision.
In my opinion you need to think of yourself first. There is no cure for schizophrenia.
So if you stay, your life will be spent on a rollercoaster ride that will never end in life as you knew it. Do not feel guilt because, it would be the same as any other couple with difficulties that one person could no longer live with. They would feel bad but ultimately put themselves first. You are only feeling bad because your wife has a severe mental illness and that is not really her fault.
It seems like you have thought about this, because you clearly state that you cannot do this anymore.
Thanks. But I love her you know. I know it’s not what I want long term and I’m sure deep down my wife knows something is wrong. It’s not what she wants either. As if schizophrenia wasn’t bad enough - some ass*ole said of let’s add in some anosognosia too I really feel so deeply for her
It sounds like part of what makes the decision so difficult is that you feel that there might be noone there to get her help when she needs it in the future. So you know if her family has been educating themselves, been to Nami meetings or have contacted them for help? Maybe you can suggest that and attend with them so they can gain as much knowledge as possible.
Is your wife experiencing these psychotic episodes while on medication?
There is no cure but meaningful recovery is definitely possible. For persons with this illness who are unable to see themselves as being sick or needing treatment, the road to get there can be very challenging. I had to learn what I could do to work toward recovery for my loved one. That started with using LEAP as explained in the book “I Am Not Sick; I Don’t Need Help”. And then, I had to be ready with every tool possible when my loved one got sick enough to actually get treatment whether or not he was in agreement. I also learned to get support from my NAMI Family Support Group and I researched the heck out of this illness, starting with the NAMI Family to Family class. I had a document I could give emergency personnel and treatment facilities that summarized all his episodes, hospitalizations, treatments, etc. We refused to let him come home (without being medication compliant). All of this created a little window of opportunity and it worked.
SO, if you feel like you have done everything you can do or are willing to do, then you may reach a decision to separate yourself from the situation.
I really feel so deeply for her