As I’ve mentioned, my son’s current psychotic break is really different from the one’s he’s had in the past, and while most of the paranoia has went away with the meds, the delusions weren’t budging.
I’ll also explain that I’m the kind of person who’ll look for the tiniest changes as a predictor that things are changing - for good or bad.
So, here’s where we are today.
I don’t think he slept night before last. He was up, active and talking about his delusions a lot yesterday, and stayed up well after I went to bed. But, he was asleep without the help of meds when I got up this morning. (I had put out everything last night but he didn’t take them).
He slept until about 1 PM, then took his meds. At around 4 PM, he wanted to show me this video where a comedian mentioned the name he has for an invention in one of his delusions. He fastforwarded to the spot, and I thought I heard it too, but it wasn’t in context, so I asked him to rewind so we could both listen closely to what was said so we could talk about it.
The guy said a word close to what we both thought he said, but it wasn’t the word.
So, he said, so what does that make me? Just some crazy guy?
Talk about heartbreaking, even though I’ve been watching every minute for some form of insight.
Now he’s covered up on the couch. I asked him if he was OK, and all he said was he felt like life wasn’t worth living. This is after a few hours ago when he asked me several times if I was OK. That’s a sign his general anxiety is kicking back in - he’ll constantly ask me that and call me if I’m late thinking something bad is going to happen to me.
As bad as it is to say, at least while he was delusional, he was kind of happy. I’m wondering if this is a psychotic mania breaking (Google says in 3-6 months, if it’s psychotic mania, it can lift even without drugs) or something else.
And, if it is, I guess we’re looking more at bipolar I or schizoaffective than schizophrenia.
Any ideas from anyone who’s been there?
I guess I’ll call the case manager tomorrow & see what she thinks. They’re all thinking schizophrenia, but I think that’s more because he shuts down around people and can barely talk. Do you guys think that if he had disorganized thoughts, etc from SZ that he’d be able to pull it together around me & his dad? He talks about bizarre stuff, but it’s all fully formed, organized thoughts at home.