Hi, I’m have one of those stretches of watching a downward cycle. My son, schizoaffective, also has a raging substance abuse issue - DOC is nitrious oxide- whippets - I almost can’t stand it ant longer. He is so out of it for days and it pronounces his symptoms so much… His moods fluctuate, he is mildly aggressive. We are trying to get him placed in a voluntary group home. He says he not go and tries to bargin that he’ll do rehab again and then in the next breath says- I’m not giving those up…but we cannot keep living like this… Any words of advice?
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You should hospitalize him or get a court order to put him into mandatory rehab or an institution. Say he’s a danger to himself and cannot take care of himself, you’ll need to provide examples.
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I understand where you are coming from. Our son loves hallucinogenic drugs and although he hasn’t done any in over six months, he talks constantly about them.
He needs long term in patient rehab but until he decides to go we are doing everything we can to keep him from them. He doesn’t have a phone but has learned how to access the Internet through his PlayStation or smart tv screen. That will be taken away now because all he does is research things he shouldn’t have.
Be firm and stand your ground and do not enable him by giving him money. It is really terrible but we cannot give in. I can’t live like that.
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Well here we are 6 mo later and we have put him out of the house. Cocaine became the new drug and we simply couldn’t take it any more. He is in a motel till his money runs out and then I told him to go to DSS. That I simply could not live with him any longer. He left saying he choses drugs over family. My heart is heavy but this time I’m not letting him back. He stole and pawned my grandmothers engagement ring too last year and I still keep trying to help. Now I help but not with him living with me.
It appears at this point the drugs have over taken the SZA. For 3 years we have done the same things trying to suppprt him. Thinking our detachment in house would work- but nothing has changed. Once again him and his dad had words he said-“ya want to go old man” and I was the one who snapped and told him choose- family and health or drugs and the street…this time there is no letting him back in. We has tried to get him in a group home- he refuses, we’ve done 28 days inpatient rehab , 2 rounds of out pt rehab, demanded SW and a day program- nothing sticks. I know it’s not the best thing but nothing nothing else has worked and he is bringing us down with him. god forgive me if it appears I’m giving us- I’m just trying not to die along with him.
His brother deserves his parents. We have given and give and all he has done is take.
Anyone else’s SZA family member a Harvey drug users?
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After all you have been through, I think you are making the best choice possible in a terrible situation.
I hope for your family to be whole and for your son to recover from his dual-diagnosis illness.
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I’m not familiar with that term but I know what it’s like to have a family member with delusional drug use and how consuming it is. It seems that this is part of my sons delusions and although I try to introduce other things for him to talk about and think about. It is really hindered his recovery. My only hope is that as he gets older he will learn that he cannot engage in this discussion and talk 24/7 He turns people off and no one really wants to be around him. He’ll get out the hospital next week and I’m already nervous about what to expect.
I love him but I can relate to not being want to be drug down with him. I’m not going to stand for any illegal activity in the home. I’ve worked too hard for our place to lose it.
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I think that is one of the hardest but wisest decisions a parent has to make. My son’s Pdoc warned against that drug and schizophrenia. He will likely learn a lot quicker.
I know how hard it is to watch that friction between two people you love but in my opinion you did the right thing. God bless and breathe deep.
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