Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

Emotional immaturity in my husband with schizophrenia


After 7 years I have decided to end my marriage with my husband with sz. He is a very emotional dependent person, and I can’t take it anymore. It seemed like everyday he would seem to have more and more energy, and my severe depression would get worse and worse. It had become codependent. He depended on me to give him life, because without me he goes back to his poverty of thoughts, flatness, and low energy. At first I felt useful in this situation, making him happy, but slowly it was taking energy from me. And I can’t do it anymore. I am disappearing myself. I don’t know how I ended up in this situation, and that it got so bad. After a while, he even started to sound like me, using phrases I use, jokes that I say. I used to think we were just getting along well, but it got really weird. It was hard to be with him too, especially for intellectual events that we would go to. He would act like he knew what he was talking about, and it became difficult to converse with him intellectually. I think I just got hung up on him because when we got married, I had just lost custody of my kids due to my severe depression and wasn’t able to care for them. He was a kind of ‘replacement’ for losing my kids. Someone to care for. But now I have been reuniting with my kids and we have been developing healthy relationships. I care about my husband, but I can’t stop my healing to make him happy.

Anybody else have this problem?