Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

Feeling worn down

He’s wearing me down, my son,
Constantly , he says yesterday “was I conceived in the normal way mum as let’s face it we are not normal”
He says he’s inbred.
He’s taken his passport (expired) and his NI card and locked the, separate from ours,
He researches all the psychiatrists /drs he has dealt with in the last four years and still insists they aren’t real drs.
He thinks they have ulterior motives as, let’s face it he says it CANT be about his mental health as no one takes it this far .

He is under at (cto) in the uk.
He believes I’m brainwashed by the drs and forced into letting them into our house,
This has steadily got worse over the last 4-5 weeks too.

Yesterday he started some psychological work with his nurse,
She came to the house and she’s doing some thoughts, feelings , pyscological stuff with him, he was acting ok with her but when she went ! His mood changed , he said don’t let her in here again and she had ulterior motives and he would end up gang raped and in the sex trade … saying this since day one and when I think back , about 6 years ago he would watch that movie “taken” with Liam neeson over and over again, I think that was the start of him getting ill and he’s incorporated that into his delusions.

He’s on 25mg of aripiprazole , the reason we haven’t looked at different meds is he actually at times has been really good on these , ok he’s never progressed much but his mood seems to have been better.
Paliperidone though def did not make him as vocal and as suspicious

Sorry for the long post, had anyone got anything similar or had anything similar,
He doesn’t have hallucinations , he occasionally hears “inner speech”

He even walked past my bedroom door last night , well 5am saying to @@@@@@@ give him a break from targeting him as I must’ve used a different washing powder as his sheet was irritating him.

I’m starting to feel bullied, manipulated again , I’ve not felt that since he’s been out hospital for 2.5 years.
Thanks for listening guys x

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Hi Jane. How long has this flare up of delusional thinking been going on? Is there a certain stressor that might have triggered it? I know it’s so hard to listen to this kind of stuff. It gets so old.

When I’ve had enough, I have to remove myself from the conversation, to preserve my own sanity. I flat out say, “I’m done talking about this. I’m not interested. Talk to a therapist.” If he continues, I say “I’ve asked you to stop, so now I’m leaving.” Then, I go behind a locked door for a few hours.

I feel like I’ve had to “train” my son how to treat me. Sometimes it’s easier said than done, but we can’t be held hostage by this illness. We didn’t cause it. We can’t fix it.

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Thanks Day-by-Day, I would say he’s deteriorated over the last few weeks.
Stressed a few weeks ago when the subject of medication review was discussed as he takes it under duress, he has zero insight.

He thinks it’s a different problem. That there is an ulterior motive behind this.
Thank you regarding the advice , I tend to do the same but lately I feel less strong and less in control.
It’s like he is stronger than me right now.

What type of stuff does your son say to wear you down?
Thanks for your help.

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Oh, @Jane57 so sorry things seems to be worsening for your son and yourself. I can’t really speak for either of those medications. I know my daughter was really delusional and paranoid believing all sorts of people were against her on any prior medication to the Haldol dec shot she is on now. The Haldol basically turned off all symptoms except talking quietly to voices when alone.

She was diagnosed in years earlier with delusional disorder (before her first sz diagnosis) because of the strange beliefs and paranoia. I don’t know what medicines she was on in the hospital then, as she destroyed the records from back then since they were wrong. However, those medicines did not handle the strongest delusions.

I agree with @Day-by-Day that when you have had enough, you probably need to retreat to a safe place to get some “me” time for yourself. I used to go stay overnight at different girlfriends’ homes during the really crazy years when both my daughter and my husband were taking turns being delusional.

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Wow oldladyblue you did well with having your daughter and husband with these beliefs.

My son also has been diagnosed with delusion disorder right now.

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Yes, it has been very bad the last three years, but slowly positive things are happening. I’ve also been drained of energy and hope and answers at times. These days life is better as psychosis for my daughter is way way down, and alcohol delusions for my husband are also way way down. I wish I could win the lottery or something to be able to truly feel I had a way out of my weird life. Money would fix so much. But just like I thought I was going to grow up and be beautiful, I never grew up to be rich either. So I’ve just learned to cope the best I can and to see the sunshine where I find it.

The son you love is still there, just he can’t fight off his own delusions…

Do try to get some alone time and peace for yourself. It is very important to be nice to yourself.

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Jane, brace yourself for a new one…

The main and ongoing delusion we’ve been listening to for the past 3 years is related to the myth of “Irish slaves”. When he’s in a bad phase, it’s all about Irish slave descendants and how they want revenge. It’s so bizarre.

I don’t know how this delusion developed, but my guess is he was reading stuff on the internet about this topic around the time of his first major break. This issue has basically crippled our son. It’s caused the bulk of his paranoia about his personal safety.

And this is after 17 months on Invega Sustenna.

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I’m so glad that your daughter and husband are improving, also that you recognise this, as sometimes I feel I can’t. You are a strong lady , you deserve peace in your life. We settle for so much less .
We get used to a “new “ type of life .
Where in the USA do you live ?

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To us here, certainly to me Day-by-Day that isn’t a bizarre delusion as it’s the type that we hear .
Bizarre yes as we don’t know how something can stay with them through all this time with absolutely no basis.
I feel my sons biggest delusion, the one where he is going to be taken out of the country and trafficked as a sex slave is also at the time of his first getting ill he used to watch that film Taken all of the time.

Thank you for this , you always help me understand more each time .

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We are on the west coast of Florida, the greater Tampa Bay area. Florida doesn’t have a lot of options for severely mentally ill, with SSI/SSDI a group home is possible. A friend’s grandson lives in one (went psychotic on spice). He got arrested recently throwing a cup of tea on her. His grandmother bailed him out, and he’s right back in that home.

I have three NAMI groups nearby, all within 1/2 hr drive in different directions. I often left their support groups in tears but at least it felt better to know I wasn’t alone battling psychosis. This forum helps tremendously also, along with my doctor at the VA. Without the police, CIT teams and 3 nearby Baker Act hospitals though, my daughter and I would still be lost. My church wasn’t much help, nor my friends or family. This certainly isn’t the life I expected. It has made me strong, but very hardened. I have little pity for the stupid problems of the “normal” people I work with. At least I have a good job. Please message me if you would like to talk further, even about flowers, or TV shows… :slight_smile:

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My experience with my son is the same.

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