Has anyone left or separated from noncompliant spouse

Hi folks. My wife has utterly destroyed our family and we are homeless. She is totally noncompliant and no amount of hospitalization has helped. Most people friends,family,clergy,and counselors think I should leave at least desperate from her. I’ve also been accused and rightly so of enabling her crazy life but I feel like a traitor not bailing her out all the time. I feel as though I could get some decent feedback here. I’m,not looking to cheat or any other motive other than some peace and any type of normal living I can start but shell hate me for stopping the cash flow. She has SSI but uses it to pay tickets and whatever else but not much for living. Any insight would be great,thanks

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I’m sorry that you are in this situation. I think you need support and you may be able to find it in NAMI. I have made mistakes enabling my loved one but I stopped and you can too. Sometimes hospitalization and getting them in the system is exactly what will give them the care they need. Especially, if their actions would land them in jail in the real world. I hope you can see your way through this and hold on to your own health. In other words take care of yourself along the way too! That is so important for both of you.

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I think it would be alright to get yourself a stable place to live and otherwise focus on your own needs without trying to fulfill hers. In a way this would help you get perspective. Then after a brief separation for practical, self-care reasons, you could decide whether or not to separate for a longer time.

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