Thanks for clarifying things, nice to meet you too, yes it is different in Canada. I always wished to have the national health care that Canada has but I see there are trade offs with everything both good and bad. I do think having your son with you is probably really helpful for him, less stressful than trying to juggle responsibilities on his own. I understand having other family members with mental illness as well, none of it I understood at all until I had to deal with my son. My mother had major depression and borderline personality disorder and was alcoholic, as are my sisters, my one sister has schizoaffective disorder and lives isolated from everyone by choice.
My son was also addicted to drugs, whatever he could get, especially pot, and he is on the autism spectrum but was never diagnosed as such, I realized in retrospect with delayed speech, tactile issues and learning delays etc…but after several very difficult years, many different kinds of medications and doctors, my son started improving on clozapine, it relieved the voices and visions and most all delusions, he also takes depakote to prevent seizures, he has had 2 but has been seizure free for over 3 years now. Today he is 33 and still lives with me, I am single and have been unable to work due to some physical illnesses for about 5 years now, so my son and I both are on disability, and I have an older son, married, who lives in California and works as a teacher. We just got back from spending a few days there visiting, it was stressful for my sz son but he did okay overall, we don’t go often so we just try to deal with the stress.
Over the years we have tried part time work, social groups etc…he did stick with AA for a long time because he liked the people there, not so much for the program, more to socialize which = smoking together outside. Anyway he quit that 2 years ago for no reason and has not returned. Work caused delusions to return, paranoia and more. It is too stressful. He never finished high school because he was so ill. I have tried to get him in remedial classes but it has always gone south. We go for long walks together, we go to a local gym from time to time and all of the local parks. We go to events when we can afford them, concerts, festivals, the occasional hockey game…he helps with housework and shopping when he can. He is a good roommate. He likes TV and music and collecting coins. He is very compliant on his meds which I understand is very rare. I am grateful that he is. I realize I could lose all of this at anytime as there are no guarantees-- but for now things are good and stable and we’re happy, at least he says he is, he doesn’t show a lot of emotion regularly but I trust if he says he feels good.
By the way I kept records too, and that is very good idea, especially if and when you can get him to see the doctor, it will help for the doctor to see what you have seen by reading your notes. Anyway, I hope he changes his mind in the near future and sees a doctor. I have read that the worst of the illness is usually before the age of 25, not always but generally, and that after 25 the positive symptoms can often (with some patients) lessen and then the negative symptoms, the lethargy, lack of direction and motivation can increase…frustrating but not as harmful as the delusions and voices etc…I see that with my son now, If I didn’t direct and redirect my son daily he would do so little just the bare minimum of eating, dressing, going outside to smoke… etc…and likely watch TV the rest of day. Occasionally I do my own thing and he does just that (the minimum) while I am gone, but usually I try to make his days (and mine) as diverse and interesting as I can. I’m here anytime you want to bounce ideas around or share and there are lots of really good people here in the very same or similar boat and at different stages of coping and caring… take care…