How to help your loved one

I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years. I did not know he had schizophrenia until about 4 months ago. He kept it a secret for a long time. I figured out he had schizophrenia due to him going into a psychosis. I actually googled his symptoms and the information came back with schizophrenia.

I then found some of his old medication in a bag when I was going through his things to try and find some more answers he had been off his meds for a year to the date. I quickly got him in to see a doctor and we got his meds figured out. He has been doing very well now. The only thing is some days are harder then other.

He will start going into this paranoia state and asking all kinds of questions like why do I love him or what is my reasoning for being with him. He also seems very negative at times. I really dont know how to handle some of these things that go on.

I am always reading books and researching diffrent sites for information, but honestly I want other peoples input that has gone through this. How do I help him stay positive and not go into that paranoia state. I feel very alone with this situation.

I have no one to talk to about it because his family lives in denial and my family tells me to leave.

He is so smart and a wonderful caring person I just would like some input on how to help him not slip into a psychosis or way to prevent the paranoia.

Hi and welcome to our forums. You are taking a great approach by learning and working to help your boyfriend.

As far as help him stay positive and not go into the paranoid state - some ideas that might help are this:

  1. Try to get him to go to a therapist for his paranoid thoughts or concerns. There is a field of therapy called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for schizophrenia , or paranoia - that could be very helpful for him. What country are you in? Its more available in the UK than the USA - but may be available elsewhere also. More details:

http://www.schizophrenia.com/sznews/archives/003568.html

and

http://www.medicaldaily.com/schizophrenias-paranoia-greatly-reduced-through-cognitive-behavioral-therapy-324640

and

http://www.psychiatrictimes.com/schizophrenia/abcs-cognitive-behavioral-therapy-schizophrenia

and

and also read up generally on how to deal with periods when a person is in pyschosis (or having a psychotic episode): Here is a page all about “First Aid for Psychosis”

http://www.schizophrenia.com/sznews/archives/005561.html

Lastly, I recommend you watch this series of videos:

and since its usually stress that causes psychotic episodes - help you boyfriend lower his stress and learn stress coping skills like slow belly breathing when he feels any stress coming on:

and

Thank you so much we are in the USA

To vichenny…I want to give you my honest love and respect for your courageousness…every man should be so lucky…secondly to SzAdmin…your answers are strong and very helpful…keep up the fight and someday we will find an answer to this culprit…ok…vichenny…here is how I am going about this at present…and actually we are going rather well…first off…I am the husband…even my name refers maybe wife…my name is Ed…Janice is my wife…it’s just easier for me to remember the username like this…no harm intended…Now…my wife is a first time diagnose 3 months ago…symptoms began Nov 2015…so I am very new to this…things progressed from Nov 2015 to Mar 2016 until we…immediate family and I…realized something was amiss…at that point we "tricked her into a visit to the clinic…not what we will call fair but we will call necessary. Thing is…as I watched things regress…I felt like she would fight us in every way possible…because this affliction has a way of denial that you and I will not recognize if we are not up to speed…same as your bf…he is ashamed and wants to hide it from you…the thing our loved ones might not understand…there is no shame in this…only love and hope for betterment…you and I will not quit on them!..you have to make this know…and understood…no matter what.
Now to explain what I have done…1st off…after the trickery of getting her to the clinic…I began to impose how much she needed to trust me…how I was not trying to hurt her or damage her spirit…how each and everything I would suggest was only given after extensive research…that if we work together we might be able to get as grip on this demon…I truly believe that the establishment of you being an ally is paramount…truly paramount…as well as having a physician that your loved one trusts…no matter what. I believe this condition has it’s own rules when it comes to recovery and/or learning to live with…

Take this any way that you want…if he trusts and believes in you…you can help…I promise you this…I will send more here in a day or 2 as we have a visit to the clinic soon…take care and know that you are always loved and respected by all in this community…thanks for the effort…Ed

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Thank you so much that was wonderful.

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