Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

Is residential living a good choice?

#1

My son is 20, diagnosed at 16 with schizophrenia.
He lives with me, I also work full time. He rarely leaves the house and has no interest in anything. There is a residential center about 10 miles away that he qualifies for. However, he has to volunteer to go. I would love some input on how I can get him to go there. I think it would be so much better for him. For those of you who have a loved one in a residential center, how were you able to convince him to go?? Thanks!

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#2

Cher, I am sorry that I am responding and I don’t have a relative in a residential center.

From my experiences with my son, what he is willing to do, he will do. That is probably why the facility has the requirement of needing them to volunteer to go.

From what others have said on the forum, presenting the benefits repeatedly to your son can make an impact, especially if there are things he would see as a benefit. Has he visited the residential center?

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#3

My son lives in one BUT they kick ALL the residents OUT OF THE HOUSE EVERY MON-FRI from 7:15am - 2pm. Meaning ANYTHING can happen at that time, as they are not supervised! Some go to a day center…some do whatever! This is why you see mentally ill people SLEEPING in public places - because they are not allowed to ride out the sedating effect of their meds comfortably in their residential home. This happened to my son upon getting into his group home. Only we didn’t realize it until a couple weeks after he moved in. Once we found out that he was being kicked out, and going to the convenience store across the street to SLEEP sitting in a booth with his head down on the table, then getting kicked out, then walking about 18 blocks (2 miles) to McDonalds, fall asleep there, get kicked out, walk .4 miles to Dunkin Donuts, fall asleep there, get kicked out and then take a 3 minute walk to ShopRite, where, as he told his sister (my daughter), that, “They are good about allowing me to sleep there [until he had to return back to the group home]” My son was living like this for two WEEKS before we finally realized! He was LIVING LIKE A BUM ON THE STREET !!! Ever since then, we have picked my son up at 7:15am M-F, brought him to our home, where he PASSES OUT IN HIS BED immediately after having breakfast (they don’t really have time to eat at the group home in the morning, as they have to line up to take meds and do their chores before having to leave). We bring him home by 2pm with the exception of some of the days when a medicab comes to bring him to his probation, therapy or psychiatry appointments. I used to drive to all those appts but my work schedule changed. I do revolve my work around being able to pick him up every morning though. My son is not functional. I think it’s cruel that these residents are forced to be out of the home every day like that, unless it’s a national holiday. I have seen the residents standing in the FREEZING COLD, waiting for their bus, meanwhile there is a VAN parked in the driveway of the group home NOT BEING USED, that could EASILY be used to transport these people, especially in such inclement weather. It really leaves much to be desired when you see some of the most vulnerable of society treated like that! Our family goes out of our way because my son is on probation, and as a twice convicted felon, (he crashed a car after being unsafely discharged from the hospital despite pleas from family he was not safe or in reality), if he gets in trouble with the law again, he will end up serving a mandatory prison sentence :frowning:

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#4

My son is in a step down facility right now, but we are trying to find a residential treatment place for him to go to. I’m visiting one on Monday. It will be the 3rd one I visit. Hopefully, this one will be a good fit for him.
You gave me some good ideas for questions to ask them. Thanks.