@valegregg58, hi Val-you took the words right out of my mouth. My son is my heart, my love, my life. He also has his own apt, is on SSI and gets food stamps and lives very close to me (which we all thought would be best). He does need additional financial help from us because he gets the very minimal amount because he has no work history. He was diagnosed @ 19, he is now 24.
He also tells me daily he loves me (with no emotion at all, but I’ll take it), and like you, on bad days, I cannot reach him. I walk over to his apt and some days he will not even answer the door. These are the bad days. He also just got his license last year and drives very well. He passed it the first time, which included the dreaded parallel parking. We are so proud of him for that. My only beef with him is that he spends so much time alone, and isolates himself. He says he has no desire to “make friends” or “hang out” with people, nor does he wish to join any support or activity groups. Sometimes I feel as though his isolation is more devastating for me than it is for him. He does not seem phased by it. He tells me he walks, reads, cooks, (he’s trying to eat healthier), and he is actually considering taking a class online. I’m very happy about that. I do wish he would just actually drive instead to the college he’s considering, and not do the online thing, but I’ll take it!
Like I said the saddest part for me is his complete isolation, and of course the scariest part is not knowing when he decides to stop his meds and relapse.
Your sons seems to be doing really well. For us, any tiny milestone brings us so much joy.