Mother's schizophrenia


#1

Hi, I’m new here and just really don’t know where else to turn to for help or at least a starting point. My mother was diagnosed a little over 10 years ago. We dealt with it without meds for a while but eventually she attempted suicide and was hospitalized. From there she was transferred to a mental institute, sorry I don’t know what else to call it at the moment. She was getting in patient treatments and was there for about 14 days. When she came home she took her medications and went to all of her appointments and seemed back to herself just lacked some energy. But then she refused to take her meds and started giving my dad a hard time about the appointments. Things were fine for a while but the voices came back and so did the hallucinations and paranoia. We just dealt with it as it came because we were told we couldn’t do anything unless she was a danger to herself or others. She always made threats but never followed through.

Fast forward to present time and she seems to be getting worse or at least I think so. She seems to have developed a bit of a hoarding problem in the last few years and has also become obsessed with a man she met. She’s done this before with the priest at our church to where the priest asked to be transferred out. A few months ago she was hospitalized for the second time and was involuntarily admitted. A lot of drama happened with an aunt who just hated the place, she made threats and needless to say they released my mom the next night. I know it’s a lot of information but I figured it would help to know her case a bit. Anyway, we are stuck and don’t know what to do to get her to see a doctor and take meds. She says there is nothing wrong with her and that it’s all witch craft being done to her by my dad and many other people. My parents live together but sleep in separate rooms and have since she was diagnosed. My dad is extremely stressed out because she is always threatening to hurt him, she can’t control her spending, and because of her obsession with this guy she met who is also married and has never given her the time of day. She also has taken out many credit cards which I don’t understand how because she doesn’t have a job. She has pawned all of her jewelry and lost it all. She makes wild accusations about my dad trying to kill and rape her and how he is gay and just so much nonsense. This has destroyed our family and we just want her back to how she was. Is there anything at all we can do to get her the help she needs? I’m always scared I will get a phone call that she either killed herself or my father. It’s just not fair to live in constant fear and concern. I know we aren’t the only family but how do we core and help?


#2

Your Mom might well have schizophrenia. I have schizophrenia, and I do well.

It sounds like your Aunt made a move that was not in your Mom’s best interest. Sorry about that. Quite often with mental illness everyone in the family has a different idea about what should be done.

Your Mom doesn’t take the meds, which seem to be her best bet for getting a life that would work better. It does sound like the first time she was on meds the meds were sedating, and maybe that was something she didn’t like. I used to be terribly sedated by my meds, but now I have a combination of meds such that I’m not tired all the time.

If you could think of something fun to do with your Dad, that might help!

Sincerely,

Jayster


#3

Welcome to the forum @rubiosusy7. Sorry about your mom.

It sounds like your mom has anosognosia.
http://www.treatmentadvocacycenter.org/index.php - under problems you will see anosognosia
Anosognosia looks like denial but is different.

Have you heard of LEAP? Maybe it can help…
http://www.leapinstitute.org/ - under resources are free videos on using LEAP
LEAP is a way of communicating to build trust. Listen-Empathize-Agree-Partner.
http://dramador.com/ - Dr. Xavier Amador is a clinical psychologist whose brother had schizophrenia. He is the founder of the LEAP Institute. Wrote the book: I’m Not Sick I Don’t Need Help! Can buy from his website.

I wish I had answers on how to get your mom the help that she needs. I’m currently going through a tough spot with my son and having to accept that sometimes things are beyond my control. Has your dad ever looked into some sort of power of attorney over your mom? Trying to limit the financial damage may be an option. What types of things is she buying/hording? Maybe some of it can be returned.

Check out http://www.nami.org/ - National Alliance on Mental Illness, for support for you and your dad.


#4

It was upsetting that they released her from the hospital the second time instead of just transferring her to another place. They didn’t even give us a treatment plan or any prescriptions for her meds.

My dad has tried to somewhat control the money he gives her but she becomes extremely upset and starts telling people that he doesn’t give her any money and treats her bad. So my dad just keeps giving it to her because he is terrified of her. She goes to thrift stores and buys anything she likes. She has bought an old typewriter, an old piano, exercise equipment, pots, pans, clothes, shoes, and it’s just never ending. I try talking to her since I’m the only one she lets see her finances but then gets upset when I suggest she cut back.


#5

only real well to get normal is find the right medicine. she might have to go back to the doctor several times to find one that works for her body. sometimes bipolar mimics schizophrenia, dementia too, shopping isnt something i did in psychosis. you can get orders from the government that she take her meds. its the easiest way for you to become the bad guy, and if you do this you are in charge of her care to make her take it.

if shes like me she cant control the voices or the behavior, she wont listen to logic. please keep in mind with her though these meds they put you on are literally necessary poison. they damage the brain, but so does psychosis. psychosis damages important things like memory,etc. antipsychotics damage parts of the brain responsible for personality and motory function ( things near and dear to the individual ). just saying this last bit to help you understand why she doesnt want to take them. quite literally shes damagong her brain and personality, either way she needs to take meds.

life on meds will bring connection, some understanding, but almost everyday i felt like my soul was being sedated, poisoned so she might need extended understanding and sympathy because although she might act normal and be preserving important parts of her brain while on meds, shes still going to be suffering.

get the government involved if you need to, just do so with the utmost empathy understanding that technically she will be aware of her suffering on the meds.

noone likes things like weight gain, insomnia, anxiety, tarditive dyskinesia, akasthia, or that numbing feeling where you have no personality.

its unfortunate but we have to accept as schizophrenics we might still be suffering when we are off meds sometimes just we dont realize it. these meds are not aspirin and you are aware everyday things could be better, in fact many take antianxiety meds or antidepressants, in addition to the antipsychotics themselves

suckiest thing about having schizophrenia was realizing the damned of you do damned if you dont feeling that both realities suck


#6

Did you tell her doctor about her threats to your father?