Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

Need someone to talk to

Family
#1

Hi there,

I need someone to talk to lately and just don’t know how to talk to. I don’t have time to schedule an appointment with a therapist and I don’t wanna be a disturbance or seem like a negative Nancy to my friends by talking about my problems. Every single day I wake up afraid of how my sister will act and how her mood will be. She because so aggressive and demanding and does the complete opposite of what we do and tell her she should do to help. We’re so nice to her and help her with everything. She doesn’t work, she’s home all day or leaves at times without telling us anything and comes back with things or nothing. she doesn’t pay for anything at home and she’s extremely demanding to my mom and tells her to make her specific food no one else eats at home. Even though this house is my parents and she’s 31 never payed for anything because my dad always paid her things even before she was diagnosed with schizophrenia, she now tells him what to do even if it sounds unusual and gets angry at him if he doesn’t. She beats him up as well for no reason because she thinks she’s intimidating like a dang bully. She was never this way, and now I’m afraid to leave my house to go to work every single day and don’t wanna go out because of her and do things I like and want to do. I’m afraid of what she will do to my parents or my dog when I’m gone because she also feeds my dog things he’s not supposed to eat. Ugh. I feel so stuck and can’t live my life even though I crave freedom and going out but I know that I do I get anxious and my mind is at home therefore I won’t be in the moment or enjoy my self.

2 Likes
#2

Self care and small steps for yourself. I know sometimes we have moments were we think how much more…I try so hard to take respinsiabilty for my self care. Be in a walk for 5 to 10 minutes , fresh air .
Learning once own lessons are a part of recovery. I learn this in a training course for carers.that 5 min just breaks a head space and I think.look what I can do…I can make things happen taking respinsiabilty I learned that does not mean taking blame for someone else reactions, moving beyond the blame. I try to do things that empower me .I like the quote you are the most inspirational person you will talk to all day. Stay well.

#3

I’ll be here to talk to! I have to recommend that you make time for a therapy sesh. They are done from zoom now so you can be comfy at home with your pup when you attend. I’ve used therapy for my own depression years ago and i an forever grateful for what it did for me. I just signed up for a session (coming up this week). It’s nice to get things off your chest without feeling like a burden and a good therapist helps you work through with the hard stuff that lingers behind your conscious and come across new perspectives that open up a world of freedom when you are feeling like you’re stuck with no place to turn anymore. Some workplaces also cover free sessions for the worker and also their family so you should research if that applies to anyone in your household (mine is called EAP). Therapy, and other self care like yoga, workouts, meditation, hiking, massages, and getting out in nature all help give me a sense of control over my own wellbeing and make it easier to not be affected by circumstances out of my control. Also, have your parents tried talking to your sisters doctor or a social worker about her aggression? Have you talked to reach other about how you feel dealing with it? I am still learning a lot about SZ and treatments but if she has anger and it is creating fear in you and your family then she may need more help/different treatment than she is receiving to get things in order. I’m sorry that you are putting off things in your life bc you want to be there to keep your family safe. That is a very loving thing to do and I’m rooting for all of you. Hope you are having a good day and do something nice for yourself this weekend. You deserve it!!