Family and Caregiver Schizophrenia Discussion Forum

Please Help! Advice Needed for Young Daughter of Schizophrenic


#1

Hello,

Thank you for taking the time to read my post. I am a college student who has just moved away from my family. I have a schizophrenic mother who refuses treatment and is very bad. My father is a hard working man who has had to spend many days and weeks out of the house to make up for my mother’s financial mistakes and medication. I am stressed out and worried because my father’s time may be running out. He has been living with Leukemia and is still working himself to death. It has really gotten to me lately, because I know he lives in pain. Not only is he physically in terrible pain, but he never gets a moment of emotional rest with my mother screaming and trudging through the house. She has lots of conspiracy theories about him and hates him to his core. My father is never happy and has tried to commit suicide a few times.

Can anyone please give me advice as what to do??

My mother is not on medication because she refuses to take it. We do not have the money for private institution (who does?!). She has been fired from all her psychiatrists. She has been rejected for insurance and I’m not sure it’d pay for private institutions anyway. She will not go to the hospital, be admitted, or any of that. She is too delusional to realize she needs it. We can not get her committed unless she hurts us, which she doesn’t routinely do. She has been committed before, but they only kept her three days and it was not enough time to do anything.

ANY advice?? I know I can not force her to do anything, but I need to do something. I love my mom but I can not let my dad live the last few years of his life this way. I’ve considered letting her come live with me, but would surely get me kicked out of my apartment that I can barely afford. Also I just got out and I’ve never lived with her my whole life that way. I study science and work full time, I don’t think I could emotionally handle her being here again. She is so hateful and angry towards us all, it makes me into a person I never want to become again.

Again thank you if you read all that.

Any input is appreciated


#2

Hi, I’m sorry to read this!!

I can’t give any advice or answers, it sounds like a very difficult situation. Schizophrenia is usually awful for the family.
I just wanted to show support


#3

Are there no state run institutions you wouldn’t have to pay for where you are? You could maybe try and find some other way to convince her to go to one, like perhaps to get some time away from your father if she believes conspiracy theories about him


#4

Wow that’s rough. She should have figured out that she needs help by that age.

Just make sure you show support for your father. At least make him feel loved. Do your best to take car of yourself and you’ll make him proud.

It is very rare a diagnosed schizo can go without meds.

Things could be worse though.

I’d focus on keeping your father happy. Figure out how to do that and you’ll feel better I’m sure.

Also he’s probably used to dealing with her. Still might not be fun, but if it’s become routine then he might be alright with it.


#5

your main responsibility is you, your health and your mental state.
your parents have chosen their own path…you are not their keeper…they are adults not children.
st johns wort is a herb not a medication available at any health food store…it will calm your mother down…and help with her moods.
i don’t take meds but have been taking this since late december…it works.
hope this helps.
know someone cares
take care


#6

In my country they or you could call a mental health act assessment and get her involuntary inpatient treatment.

After which they would probably put her on a CTO (Community Treatment Order) and force her to take her medication orally or injectable indefinably.

But this solution is less than ideal! Some of the newer depot antipsychotics aren’t bad and don’t have the same problems as the older meds, but are more expensive.

These pathway to care isn’t ideal, but your circumstances are quite extreme.


#7

Unfortunately all the state run institutions were shut down where I live. She’s really admit about not leaving the house and making my dad give her money, so I’m not sure if I could convince her but I can try. Thank you


#8

Thank you for your support

What country do you live in? I have not studied the law in detail but I know there are a lot of laws set up here that allow mentally ill people to refuse treatment, and my dad has told me so. I know we can try to get power over her and the court can maybe order injections like you said, but my dad makes it sound like they will not approve it. Do you have more information?


#9

Your mom is sick, she has a mental illness, mental illness make bad things happen when going through the episodes. You have two parents that need care. I’m sure your parents love you. Your a a great daughter, you care about your parents. Find some legal counseling, seek professional help and advice. Good luck. This is your journey. Take care of yourself.


#10

By the way you say ‘state’ I’m guessing your in the USA so don’t know where to signpost you to, as the laws are different here in some of the various countries that make up the UK.

I guess if it ever becomes really bad you could call 911 and call out a ambulance, or drag her to the nearest emergency dept.


#11

Maybe you could talk to a lawyer who is knowledgeable in this field. Let him know that your mother is draining you of all your resources. You might be faced with a choice of making her live on the street or take med’s. Explore all the legal avenues for a forcible commitment. Try as hard as you can to get med’s in her.